Reflections
by J.B. Writer
Summary: Confused, Nina wakes up to a world that's too perfect to be true.  When she begins to realize things aren't right, it becomes a nightmare world with nowhere to turn.  Only one person seems to be real.  Only one can help her.  Her rival and love Lily.
1. New Skin

**A/N: **Not such an original idea but hopefully the execution will be enough so you guys will dig it. This has little to do with my previous story directly. This is going back to the roots of what I thought Black Swan was. Hope you like.

Sequel to other story will be out when I feel a proper ending is already thought out. This will give me my Nina/Lily fix... while exploring a different style. Something more like the movie and much shorter than Birds of a Feather.

Enjoy!

* * *

**Chapter One: New Skin **

"_Wake up Nina… wake up please…"_

_... Should I go back to sleep?__  
_

The fluffy pillow hit the floor first. The thick furry blankets soon after. Nina shot out of bed in an exhale of utter desperation, covered in a cold and wilting sweat. It was that uncomfortable feeling anyone would understandingly loathe, the moisture sticking her pajamas to her skin like glue. Her deep breaths that followed were meant for someone who was drowning in an ocean, not someone sitting up in a cozy bed.

She holds her bony chest as if her heart was about to give, wondering why she was so frightened and alert. It takes a few moments but she realizes she was safe and inside her house. She realizes that nothing was happening. It was all just a dream.

_I felt like I died but there was no pain._

Was it some sort of dream? Nightmare?

_I don't remember… a thing._

Like any shaken sleeper the darkness wasn't doing it for her anymore, a flip of the light switch on the panel to the side illuminating the room in a warm amber glow. Nina rubbed her eyes to wetness as the light stung her at first, blinking her way to an iris adjustment. She took a look around with those gleaming pupils that seemed to not recognize a thing. She was puzzled yet as she continued to analyze things began to slowly come back… kind of.

_My room is so nice and clean. So big. So white and black. No clutter. No butterflies… no pink._

… _B-but why would it be pink? _

_Butterflies?_

It was a scary feeling. Things felt familiar… yet didn't. Her room was so spacious and free, like it _always _was. She wondered if the dream she couldn't remember had shaken her up that badly. Was that even possible? Was this some sort of disease?

_You really need to relax._

Nina just shook her head with a ginger touch, trying to straighten out with a nice old fashioned shakedown. As usual it was a stupid theory that never worked. She takes a look at her digital clock that blinked in crimson that it was 6:15 a.m.

One hour before she would usually wake up for a school day.

Trying not to risk more of this splitting headache, the young girl stood up with a crack of her body and walked towards her interconnected bathroom, a nice layer of marble tiles tickling her feet with icy coldness. Her room was such a high scale design that fit a hi-end modern home, furnished with so much of the designer creations and novelties. She noticed this especially in a peak over at the electric toothbrush and wall dryer, those technical "marvels", staring at them like they haven't been there for all these years.

_Maybe a bath would-_

A glance at the new age shower right in front of her crated a sigh. Indeed showers _are_ nicer. Nina gulped, feeling like her insides were fighting with one another just to go through the motions.

She began to strip off her pajamas slowly and carefully, feeling the smooth expensive silk that covered her body gently pass. The color pink began to float into her head but she stuffed it, thinking only of the comfort. She felt so pampered – enjoying the sensation of rich fabric, seeing the white garments hit the floor being the only minute she remembered she was stripping in the first place. She took a peak at herself in the mirror, her young naked body in clear view, very strong but lean… like a dancer of some sort. She looked beautiful and flawless…

_A dancer._

"Flawless…" Nina paused again as she turned her back towards the mirror, running her fingers towards her shoulder blades as if something was supposed to be there. She sees nothing and feels nothing but smooth skin… not a blemish… not a scratch… not a scar.

_This… has to stop._

She leaps into the shower with a foggy mind, the warm water hits her face soon after, sprinkling its cleanliness. She was praying maybe she could wash away whatever was shaking her up, these feelings making her head feel light. The steam slowly fogs up the entire bathroom like she was doing to her own head… no more reflections to be had.

- B – B – B –

School uniforms were a requirement apparently, and the large array of button up shirts and skirts scattered in her huge walk-in closet were not a coincidence. Black and white was all she had… so monotonous but some reason at least that felt right.

Nina walked out of her room dried and cleansed, dressed like the schoolgirl she was, the shower only doing half the job she hoped it did. Once out her thick oak door she traveled the hallways of her home, still feeling like an alien in her own living space. She looks around curiously to see the expensive woods and furniture that littered the entire area, admiring the beauty and smell of it. Expensive oaks, mahogany, and maple… had a certain rich scent. One she should've remembered nostalgically living here so long but didn't.

She takes a few steps towards the center staircase, now seeing the entire New York Time Square area… _remembering _she lived in a upstate Penthouse next to the Ground Zero Memorial.

_Our family is rich…_

"Nina, you're up so early. This is a nice surprise."

Nina turned to see a sight she would meet every morning. For some reason… just like everything else, the image just wasn't sitting right.

"… Mother… hi."

"Oh dear are you okay?" Erica Sayers curled her brow at Nina, walking over and touching her forehead. "You look a little pale. You sick?"

"I… I don't know."

Nina could only continue staring at her mother with her mouth a bit a gape – or what she knew this to be her mother at least. This bright ball of energy that was dressed like the fit business woman she was called herself Ms. Sayers. A successful artist and seller, an investor in performing arts, Erica Sayers was known around the world for her accomplishments. Her mother was… a success.

_I guess._

"You're not hot or cold." Erica shrugged nonchalantly. "Must be tough at school huh?" She looked down at the mention of her studies, thinking right away of her uniform. "My goodness, since when did you start wearing your skirt so damn low Nina? You look like a grandma."

"W-what?" Nina blinked, looking down, seeing no problem with the length.

"No daughter of mine with your looks will be so conservative." Erica began grabbing at her waist, and adjusting it so it would skimp up. "You have a beautiful body. Use it dear. It gets you far. Don't forget to unbutton a bit of your-"

"… Mother!" Nina's eyes were wide open, turning away and straightening out everything. She hugged herself. "I can dress myself…"

"Heh, what is up with you today? You're so high strung." Erica blinked in surprise but dropped it, walking over to the table to pour some fresh coffee. Nina smelt the aroma instantly, glancing over to see plates of breakfast meats and pancakes ready to be devoured. The delectable smells calmed her… for the moment.

"I-I… apologize mother." Nina frowned, holding her head. "I don't know what's wrong with me today."

"It must be the school stress. Relax a bit. Don't push yourself too hard and burn out." Erica drank her coffee quite snugly. "You've been in your room a lot the past few days like a hermit. Go outside and have some fun! You used to be so outgoing."

_Fun…_

_Outgoing…_

For some reason deep down somewhere in her mind, Nina wanted to laugh crazily. Her calmed self was thinking better of it.

"M-mom…" Nina looked at Erica seriously, staring at her like she was analyzing a complete stranger. "Have you ever had a dream where it felt… more real… than when you woke up?"

Erica stared back at her child as she sat meekly at the table, looking a bit worried. She watches as Nina nibbled at a piece of bacon like a little bird. "Um… what kind of dream did you have Nina?"

"I honestly don't remember." Nina massaged her temple with tightened eyes. "Something like a fairy tale yet, very real."

"They're just dreams Nina. Just relax okay? I don't want you getting sick or anything." Erica walked over to her daughter, kissing her head with a lovely smile. "I'm not going to be home tonight. Thomas and I are going on a business trip to Baltimore for a potential art gallery showing."

"Thomas… Leroy… right?" Nina felt like she was guessing… but wasn't.

"Y-yes dear." Erica chuckled even more concerned. "The guy I've been dating for the past four months now. Do I need to remind you about taking care of your sister while I'm gone too?"

"S-sister…"

"Um, maybe I should tell Geoffrey not to take you to school today." Erica stated with a blink, only to begin laughing after a thoughtful moment. "Oh I know what this is. Senioritis. You just don't want to go to class and be lazy Ms. Trickster."

"… Right." Nina looked over towards the counter seeing a little lunch bag with a name on it.

_**Anni…**_

"Okay I have to run." Erica looked at her watch, standing up after kissing Nina's head again. "That's your sister's dinner for tonight. She loves it when I pack her food in lunch bags. I think you'll probably be out with your friends doing something so you can grab whatever you need. Call me if anything is up alright Nina?"

_Anni… sister? I don't even…_

"I… s-sure thing mommy…" Nina's head was just pulsing like a stressed vein, trying to get a grip. She didn't notice but she cut her egg yolk with her folk on accident, watching now as the yellow amber flowed over her plate.

"Mommy loves you Nina." Erica walked out of the room in a wave, taking her business coat and suitcase. "Don't forget to tell Anni she's my sweet little girl alright? See you tomorrow."

_Sweet little girl…_

"O-kay…" Nina clutched her hair tight, putting her utensil down frustratingly, staring at her plate. The yolk was deflated, spilling out all the liquid it had.

Stabbed and bled out to emptiness.

- B – B – B -

Nina was a trooper and she knew and felt surely about that. She was forcing herself to stop the questions, biting her lip every time she wanted the strange feelings to come out. She took the elevator all the way down to the first floor, down the many stories of the Trump Towers building like her _memories _told her to do, stepping out to a large black limo waiting for her. What popped out of the car next made her want to jump back in a heart attack.

"What up baby!"

"Gah!" Nina took a few steps back in a stagger, almost dropping her book bag.

The girl's head that popped out of the top of the limo's sunroof laughed. "Whoa, what's up with you today? You look kind of tense."

"Gailana stop scaring her. She just woke up you jerk." Another girl lowered the tinted windows, smiling and waving at Nina. "Come on! We're gonna be late for class girlfriend!"

"You're the jerk Madeline… making her hurry up." Galiana dropped down from the sunroof like a mole.

"Just shut up. You two are both jerks that talk too much."

"Veronicaisabitch." Madeline _sneezed _which made Galiana giggle.

"Takes one to know one M." Veronica replied with a playful smile while typing on her smartphone. As the door opened, Nina could now see three school girls dressed in uniform just like her. Very posh. Very sexy. Very short skirty. These were her _friends. _She was _sure _of it.

"Gailana, Madeline and Veronica." Nina named the girls off like a robot, looking at them as she walked into the limo. She closed the door in a tight and soft click. These names brought back something. Whether they were part of the dream… she didn't know. She couldn't know.

"Chip chip cheerio! To school Geoffrey! We shan't be late!" Gailana commanded in a mocking English accent.

"But of course dear Gailana, whenever you three decide to join me and Master Nina it is quite the delight." Their driver and English voiced butler Geoffrey's sarcasm rang as he began to take off.

"So why do you look like you've been brain scrambled this morning Sayers?" Veronica glanced over at a silent Nina.

"I don't know…"

"You do look kind of out of it. And not even the fun version of that." Madeline leaned back a bit concerned. "Let me guess, boy problems?"

"Yeah… like too many boys to handle?" Gailana laughed, of course knowing how great Nina Sayers had it with the opposite sex. "I wished I had that problem! Benjamin is all over you lately by the way. Are you two a pair yet?"

"Benjamin…" Nina nodded dumbly like a child, trying to remember the name. She faintly did so, ciphering the images of the normal pretty boy a popular girl like _her_ would be dating. "I… don't think so. No we're not… a pair."

"Good so I have a chance!" Gailana pumped her fist quite excited.

"A _slim_ chance…" Madeline adjusted her friend's hopes.

"Fuck you…"

"Love you…"

"Oh right, the Sadie Hawkins dance is coming up isn't it?" Veronica smirks almost diabolically. "I'm so looking forward to this."

"You just can't wait to deny a lot of hopefuls." Both the other girls said at the same time.

"You guys know me too well."

There was familiarity with the moment. Nina felt like an odd girl out in the conversation yet what got her was that she was the center of attention. Nothing was out of the ordinary and this is what high school girls talked about. Yet why did it all feel so strange? Talking about boys. Talking about popularity. Talking about how pretty they were. This… was normal. This is what normal girls do.

"Um hey, what's that building over there?" Nina finally chimed in on the talk, pointing to a structure that strangely meant something to her. She didn't know why.

"Oh that's the Lincoln Performing Arts center." Madeline glanced at the beat up and wrecked building. "That thing has been closed for years Nina. We drive by it all the time."

"… W-why did it close?"

"Because it was showing things like lame artsy stuff, old people entertainment." Gailana said the next cryptic words with such a cute timber. "… Of course it'd die."

_Die…_

"Nina are you cool?" Veronica looked over with a few bats of her lashes, placing her phone away in her backpack. "You're so quiet. Usually you're leading us in the conversations remember?"

"I do that yes, I do…" Nina took her eyes off the passing building coming back into the conversation rather awkwardly. She glanced at the three girls that were supposed to be her closest circle of friends. Apparently. "Sorry guys… I'm just not… feeling myself today. I don't know why."

"Aw, poor Nina. Our leader is not having a good day!" Gailana clung onto her making Nina lean back and eyes wide. "Don't worry! we'll make you feel better by the end of tonight alright?"

"Hell yeah, the party at your house tonight with no mother is going to be off the hook!" Veronica clapped. "Pool parties… oh I can't wait."

"Pool party…" Nina stuttered confused. She was just trying to play the part now. "Yes… totally."

The three girls just looked at one another after staring at Nina for an awkward second. The confused one just sighed, closing her eyes, knowing it was probably better just to keep her damn mouth shut. The trio of friends began to converse about the same things they always did, Nina nodding along as she was apparently in a day of catching up to _reality._

- B – B – B –

_Odette and Odile_ High School was a school for the privileged and rich. It was a school of the arts mostly that pride themselves on prepping their students for the future in creativity as well as academics. That's what Nina remembered a bit clearly, looking at the impressive campus that would rival a small boutique university. All kids here were pretty much cut from the same mold, all dressed alike, all act the same, and mostly were predictable.

Well… maybe not all.

A loud vroom scorches by Nina and her friends as they watch a black blur slide into the parking lot almost leaving tracks. Nina honestly felt that there should've been some fire or smoke as fast as this daredevil was going. After finding their hearing again, off the bike leapt off a small girl, clad in all black from head to toe. It was a biker jumpsuit with a black helmet on top that covered her like a midnight sky. Nina couldn't take her eyes off this strange anomaly in this place, watching as her helmet came off.

She was so beautiful… yet hauntingly familiar.

"That Lily chick is such a showoff." Veronica bitterly roamed.

"A very cute show off." Gailana smiled. "I have her in my English class. She's like barely there."

"She definitely isn't like most of us that's for sure." Madeline commented. "Guess San Francisco brings out the _different _kids."

_Fresh off the plane from San Francisco._

"Lily…" Nina said the name in repetition, feeling strange feelings that welled up all at once. She felt too many things even… not being able to realize any of it.

All Nina knew was that she was staring at something she couldn't resist. Lily was the most gorgeous and most mysterious sight Nina had ever seen. Her dark hair bristled out of the helmet like smooth silky locks, swinging around as she whipped it back and forth to straighten. Her skintight suit hugged her lean yet somehow curved body that Nina couldn't look away from. When Lily bent over to lock the bike in place… Nina couldn't take her eyes off a more certain area in the caboose.

"She's getting so popular so fast." Madeline commented with a high schooler's train of thought. "You might have some competition Nina."

_Competition?_

Nina was half listening, continuing to stare in amazement as this Lily seemed to have no insecurities whatsoever, pulling off her jumpsuit in midday light, revealing her school uniform underneath. She doesn't care whose watching, unzipping her bag and pulling out her uniform skirt. She yanked it over the shorts she was wearing, and hiked them up. She slithers out of the covered shorts beneath, tossing it in her bag. A few students immediately walk up to her exchanging high fives and pleasantries… lighters and cigarettes coming out.

Lily lit a cig smoking, fumes coming from them soon after. The bad girl of the school clearly in Nina's sights.

"Oh crap. Come on… we got five minutes till class! I'm gonna be late!" Gailana squealed as she sprinted off with her books. Veronica and Madeline just laughed amused as they went their own ways much more calm.

"See you at lunch Nina!" Madeline waved.

Nina nodded still having a one track mind as Lily was conversing with boys, all of them just swept away by her charm. The longer she stared at Lily the more she began to not feel… so strangely awkward to what has happening today. Like… this person was the only one that was making any sense in her mind… yet she barely knew her.

Suddenly when those dark eyes met with Nina's stare. Nina felt like her body just froze up as a frightened stone. Lily gave a little smirk with that pretty face, seeing a voyeur's awkward pause staring back with no reply. Nina blushed instantly, looking down as she scooted off to class in a hurry.

Lily's eyes track her like a bird… of prey the whole time.

- B – B – B –

The bell rang as Nina took her seat just before the clock hit 8:30.

"Alright class, I hope you had a wonderful weekend. Week three is already here. Isn't that amazing?" The teacher turned to the board with her marker. "Alright everyone, papers out we're going to do a pop quiz."

The whole class began to groan as Nina notices a face poke into the classroom door. Of course it had to be that… Lily. Everyone looks over to see a Lily with her finger to her lips, telling everyone to be quiet. She opens the door as silent as a mouse, creeping in with light agile toes. She almost makes it to her desk but suddenly the teacher clears her throat.

"Lily… you're late… again."

"Fuck…" Lily grunted under her breath, turning with a big smile. "All apologize. It will not happen again Ms… uh… Ms."

"Mrs. Jackson."

"I'm sorry… Mrs. Jackson. I am for real." Lily bowed her head.

"Lily you've been late to eight of the ten classes. The other two you probably snuck in without me noticing. This has to be a Guinness World Record for two week tardiness. Young lady you will not result to anything with that sense of time."

"Right..." Lily really didn't want to hear any of it.

Nina watched on quietly as the brashness of this girl was enticing her as well as evoking admiration. The confidence and the swagger Lily had was something everyone seemed to be jealous of. Especially Nina… who apparently was supposed to be something like this according to her friends.

"Another detention for you. That's nine in the first eleven classes, probably another record." Mrs. Jackson pulled out the pink slip, preparing to write.

"Whoa! But Mrs. Jackson if you write that detention for me you're letting me off the hook!"

"This is a philosophy class Lily and I can't imagine your logic there."

"Like you said. If you give me that detention that's two Guinness World Records I'd have." She made a peace sign. "Journalists are going to come down and interview me on TV. Then? I get my pretty face on all of people's screens around the world."

The teacher tapped her foot as the class looked on quite amused.

"Then a director or producer is going to spot my photogenic beauty. I'm going to get a TV gig or a spot in a movie. Next? I star with Brad Pitt and Tom Hanks in an academy award winning film. I become a superstar! Don't you see? You're making me into a superstar by being a tardy kid! Punish me by not doing anything! Take away my dreams like the just and fair teacher you are!"

"… Just _sit down_ Lily." Mrs. Jackson handed her the pink slip abruptly ending the show. Lily twitched frozen after her bravadoes debate as the class was laughing.

"You're definitely not going in my acceptance speech." Lily pointed out the threat with a hmph, taking the slip and walking off. The teacher was cross armed and shaking her head as Nina giggled a bit herself. Lily walked by catching her giggling, Nina quickly shutting down and looking at her paper.

"Sit next to Ms. Sayers. You might need someone who's actually academically efficient to rub off on you."

"Sure thing teach." Lily rolled her eyes as she sat down next to Nina, looking around as everyone had a piece of paper except her.

Nina felt a nudge of her desk.

"Hey Swan Queen."

_Swan… Queen?_

"W-what… did you call me?" Nina looked into Lily's eyes for a second… getting lost in those dark orbs. She felt something pop inside mind like a fizzle at those words. Her mind felt right looking at Lily.

"Prom Queen…" Lily blinked as if she was wrong. "Weren't you Prom Queen winner last year? Maybe I'm wrong… I was probably fucked up when someone told me that fact."

"… I… guess I was." Nina gulped as the comfort of looking at Lily fought with… awkwardness. "What do you want?"

"I was going to ask for a piece of paper to take this lame quiz." Lily ogled her up and down, smiling to herself at Nina's sweetness. "Can you be a doll and lend someone in need some tree waste?"

"S-sure…" Nina began reaching into her bag, taking out the folder underneath her desk. From above Lily had a look that was sensual yet… creepy all at once. Looking at Nina like she was some sort of forbidden fruit. Like she was some glorious… object.

"Here you go." Nina handed Lily the paper, avoiding eye contact for the most part.

"Thanks… your name is Nina right?" Lily took the paper with a gentle pull, Nina nodding in reply. She notices Nina's uncomforting body language. "Uh something wrong with you today?"

"I've been getting that question a lot and yes. I don't feel so well."

"Ah, the school playing a little too rough for ya?" Lily began to whisper beneath the classroom's rustling.

_We playing a little too rough for you?_

"I…" Nina glanced back over to Lily as she felt images shoot into her mind. Colors. Dancing. Blurry events. She… just couldn't make sense of any of it. All she knew was that these images were intense pulses that were jolting but ironically calming.

"Good luck on your quiz. I think you'll do amazing."

_**"So the big day's getting closer and closer huh? Well… I can't wait. I think you're going to be amazing."**_

_I feel like I know you…_

_Why do I feel like I know you so well?_

During the quiz Nina couldn't help but peak over from time to time as Lily was writing carelessly, actually listening to music with ear buds while doing so. She was so pretty and flawless. She was dark but warm. She was so familiar yet so mysterious.

She was the only thing… that made sense.

_You stare at me like I'm ecstasy.  
On the surface you hate,  
But you know you need me._

_I come dressed as a pill,  
In all black as you deem fit,  
Whatever helps you swallow truth  
A bit more easily..._

* * *

**A/N: **Just like all horror films... everything starts off so nice. Lily and Nina romance will be a necessity regardless!


	2. Old Insides

**Chapter Two: Old Insides**

"_Why did you have to go hurt yourself like that…?"_

_I don't know who to trust  
No surprise  
Heavy thoughts sift through dust  
And the lies…_

It's a fundamental command that's ingrained in every student's etiquette. During a test or quiz you should always _keep your eyes on your own paper. _Obviously the message would clear over many a students' heads for generations and generations. For Nina? She was apparently just another statistic.

_Everybody feels so far away from me.  
Except you…_

Nina couldn't help it. Why did the teacher have to sit Lily next to her? Her carefree aura. Her embodiment of sexy. Her demanding presence. Lily commanded her attention from everyone even in concentrated silence. Was this attraction? Was this… jealousy?

"Ms. Sayers! I can't believe this!"

"Huh?"

Nina shook out of her strong gaze at Lily and saw her teacher close in like a heat seeking missile, eyes enlarged and face displeased. She towered over a seated Nina like a gargantuan shadow while the rest of the class froze in non-envious anticipation.

"Don't you give me that innocent look Nina. I saw you clearly staring over towards Lily. You were cheating!"

Nina didn't even reply, not really knowing what to say.

"Don't you have anything to say for yourself?" Mrs. Jackson glanced at Nina's paper, seeing not a single word being written down. "So you didn't know what to write, and you resorted to peaking." She shamefully shook in disapproval. "Of all people Ms. Sayers… you?"

"I…"

"Come on teach, cut the girl some slack." Lily came to her defense quite snugly, making Nina glance over in surprise. "She can't be Ms. Perfect all the time. Besides how do you know she was cheating? Maybe she was cracking her neck. Or maybe she just thinks I'm hot and couldn't take her eyes off me."

The class laughed as Nina put her head down shamefully with an embarrassing warmth overcoming her.

"Lily don't even-"

"Honestly, Nina Sayers, academic superstar cheating off of me? Are you kidding?"

"It does sound strange for her. I'll give you that."

"Look at what I wrote down and tell me if you'd cheat off of me!" Lily pushed her paper in her teacher's face, a drawing of some sort of bird on the corner and some words written neatly in the middle.

"If you're thinking about my baby… it doesn't matter if your black or white."

_Black…_

_White…_

"Lily if you're going to write down something that has nothing to do with my question? At least write something original! These are lyrics from a song! You put no thought into this whatsoever."

"Of course I'd use MJ. You two have the same last name! See! I _was_ thoughtful." Lily made the most innocent face. "Say, if I get up and grab my crotch, scream and do a moonwalk? Will you take away my detention? … I promise my moonwalk is second to none."

"If you so much as think of standing? You're only getting another one!" Mrs. Jackson put the paper down on Lily's desk in frustration, turning to Nina. "Ms. Sayers keep your head down and start writing! You're lucky I am giving you the benefit of the doubt. Now continue!"

And like that it was business as usual. Nina let out a sigh as she was back to work on her quiz half-heartedly. A beauty had just saved another beauty.

Mysterious Lily just came to her aid.

Why would a rival… come to her aid?

- B – B – B –

The bell rang and everyone rushed out of class like they had been in the worst torture for the last fifty minutes. Only two were left isolated in the room. A scene that played itself out somewhere… and sometime before. Nina was packing her bags at a ginger pace, still working as slow as the clock hand itself. She was one. The other one in the room was just looking over her shoulder like the hawk she was.

"You really are out of it aren't you?" Lily commented as she grabbed her bike helmet, not a book or anything else educational to pack up. "I know we don't talk much but I do know you're not acting like yourself."

"I… yes…" Nina looked up with every ounce of strength to compose herself, making sure she at least looked strong. "Thank you for helping me… by the way."

"No problem." Lily looked a bit concerned as she took a seat on the table of the desk. She was apparently waiting for Nina. "So… what's going on with you? Never seen little Ms. Perfect off her game. You usually own this place."

"I really don't know." Nina mumbled with no sense of truth, just looking into Lily's gaze as if it was the only thing being honest with her. "… Just… having… a hard day."

_Just a hard day…_

"Hard day huh? Aw, you poor thing." Lily's deeper tone of voice and friendly nature was rubbing Nina in a genuine way. It still felt so peculiarly familiar. Nina wanted this feeling to never end as bad as this day had started. She wanted to feel normal so badly. That didn't seem like an unreasonable request.

"… I'm sorry you got a detention." Nina for the first time was thinking of something relevant to what was happening around her. "You almost got away with it."

"Heh, don't worry. I got my ways around having to sit there and waste time." Lily was quite confident, something that once again rang true. She pulled out a bag of what looked to be… grass. "I got a lot of bargaining power if you know what I mean."

Nina did know what she meant. It was already scary she knew what she meant. Lily was… a druggie. Lily was… a risk taker. Lily was… as real as it got. And she didn't care what people thought. She knew this…

"Huh, I think everyone's a little weirded out that you and I are standing next to each other." Lily's statement made Nina glance around at the room, where anyone and everyone were staring back at the strange pairing. "Apparently we're rivals or something. Silly huh?"

"Yeah… um… really silly."

A few boys with hairdos that would be found on punk rockers or metalheads were making their way towards Nina and Lily, the darker haired one smiling cutely. "Well, that's my cue to head off. By the way, I hear you're having a party tonight. I must have missed out on the invitation or something cause I never got it in the mail."

"… Oh? I apologize… I… almost forgot I was even… having one." Nina's words couldn't explain her forgetfulness or rather her cluelessness.

"So does that mean I'm invited?" Lily was backing off to her crowd with a pleasing grin.

"Sure… of… course."

"Heh good." Lily made a mutual nod of an approval after a playful pause. "I was going to crash the party anyway… saves me the trouble. Can I see your phone?"

"M-my phone?"

"Yeah… your phone. The thing you use to call people with. It's a really nice invention really."

Mockery aside, Nina slowly reached into her bag, pulling out a little pink cell, handing it to Lily. She began to type away furiously yet expertly with one hand as she backed off. After a few more types, she grins as she tosses the device, Nina catching it with two hands against her chest.

"See you tonight!" Her smile literally brightened up the room. Nina looked at her screen which read.

_Lil Lily ^_^_

_(415)225-6660_

Before she could even realize Lily had just given Nina her number, she watched as the dark beauty turned to embrace her friend… or boyfriend… or…boyfriends. Nina didn't really know how to react at the sight. She felt almost… bad feelings watching her hug them. Something inside her told her it wasn't what it seemed…

_Lily doesn't do relationships._

… _How do I know this?_

- B – B – B -

The classes until lunch were eventless but still a mind trip. Nina was a popular girl. She knew she was told this but inside, she wasn't used to random people she barely knew vying for a moment in her day. So many boys would smile and wave at her, begging to have a few moments of her time. She tried her best to be polite and be the _girl everyone says she was. _She felt she wasn't performing up to task.

At lunchtime Nina was standing alone in the school grotto area, needing a break from the barrage of people that 'knew' her constantly socializing with her. A statue of an angel beautifully erect in the middle of the garden was her distraction from living a life she felt disconnected to. The statue. No… the art was flawless… and perfect. The way its wings spread and it held its head up high spoke volumes to Nina even though she didn't fully understand why.

"Nina Sayers! My favorite student!"

Nina turned quickly at the shout but was already being in an embrace of a younger teacher, trying to get a glimpse of exactly who was hugging her. The smells of exotic perfumes and a tight grip was making her even more disoriented than she already was.

Ms. McIntyre was always… so neighborly. It was her contemporary dance teacher. One of the nicer folks in the school. She knew this teacher very well… she must have idolized her in some shape or form.

"You keeping up with the dance moves I taught you last week?" The pretty lady backed away, staring at Nina with caring eyes.

"… I am sure… that um… I did work on them."

"Good, good." The one named Beth pulled up a digital camera. "Oh, I have to show you pictures of our post first show party. You and the girls had such a good time that I had to show you all. You're my favorite so you get to check it out first Nina."

Nina only stared on dumbly as her teacher kept cycling through images on the camera. They were all dressed up and on stage, all in black and white outfits that were tight and blank. Nina slightly recalled performing regularly for school events, apparently this one a pretty big night for the dance class. The images afterwards of them in the back, smiling, laughing… and being silly made Nina slowly take the camera from her teacher's hands without a word.

She cycled through certain pictures repeatedly. Watching this _Nina_ in black laugh it up with friends. Watching this _Nina_ giving Gailana the bunny ears in one picture. Watching _that Nina_ nuzzle against a few of the girls' noses. Watching another _Nina_ in some handsome boy's arms, being held up like they were a married couple.

"You must really like those pictures Nina…" Beth looked at her puzzled. "You okay?"

_Who the hell is that girl in the pictures?_

"Sorry… just trying… to remember what that day was like." Nina handed the camera back after the stark silence, breathing heavier just from the thoughts.

"Jeez, you're acting like you're sleeping awake." Beth stroked her hair worried. "You're a young girl. Don't be pushing yourself too hard now. Youth can't be given back. Enjoy it while it lasts Nina…"

_**"Enjoy it while it lasts Nina!"**_

The words made Nina gasp as she glanced back up at her teacher, expecting some dark force to be staring right into her face. When Beth was just smiling and looking so cute and pretty… she could only back away slowly.

"I… I have to go." Nina turned and began walking off faster, wishing to the bottom of her heart that this day. That these… feelings would stop.

"Okay! See you tomorrow…" Beth blinked a few times. She couldn't remember when Nina looked so… frigid.

- B – B – B –

_Tension is building inside.  
Steadily.  
Heavy thoughts forcing their way  
Out of me_

( Subway Metro )

After school Nina didn't want to be driven home today. She wanted to use the metro. She wanted to make a few stops and let it sink in. Nina was done asking questions to why she felt this way and began to just do. She sat to herself towards the corner in the crowded subway tram, all of them loaded up like sardines in a can. As the subway rumbles she closes her eyes trying to rest them. It was irony. What she was seeing… what she thought she was seeing…

Those eyes weren't even being used she felt like.

After a long ride the subway stops at her destination, the crowd moving quickly and franticly like New York City was known for. Nina felt her bookbag slip off her lean shoulder as a few unruly pedestrians cut her off, her bag sliding down the subway car. She frustratingly sighs as she walks over, about to kneel down to grab it. The bag is lifted for her though and brought to her face.

"Here you go little lady." An old man grinned at her, having the backpack up and ready for her to take.

Nina didn't say a word to the old man, recognizing his face somewhere… before. She takes the bag, looking into those strange… eyes. That face…

_** Nina sat across the subway… alone… staring as an old man was looking right at her… doing the most grotesque and disgusting gestures at her. He was an old senile pervert…**_

"W-what's wrong? Aren't you going to say thank you?"

Nina only held her breath as her heart was beating so fast, needing to get away from this man. He was… a monster. She darted out of the subway tram, looking back nervously, making sure he wasn't following her. She fights through the crowds now and was lost in the sea of people, becoming one with the walking traffic. She felt this familiar walk and felt right with every stride, pressing those walker feet into the pavement. Walking to her destination… the Lincoln Center was the right thing to do.

Being alone was… how things were supposed to be.

"Performers only…" Nina whispers as she walked towards the building she needed to see, an old rusting sign with an arrow pointing to the back greeting her. There is a yellow tape all around the building preventing people to go into the closed off venue. She glances around as the crowd paid no attention to this place. Around them was business as usual. This performing theater… was a lost memory. Left to be replaced and forgotten.

She walks over to the marquee and empty rectangle meeting her, a place usually where a poster or ad would be placed. Across were the doors which were chained shut and blockaded. Nina didn't know why. But she spent the afternoon trying… to get inside.

She couldn't figure out how.

- B – B – B –

_Take everything!  
From the Inside!  
And throw it all away!_

It was a bit late but Nina arrived _home. _

She walked into the glitzy apartment with a slump of her book bag against the couch. She expected more peace and quiet but that would've been too _normal. _Nina could hear the loud hip hop music from outside the doorway to her suite, wondering what was going on the minute she stepped home. When Gailana and Madeline popped their heads out the door, her question was answered… sadly.

"Finally you're back. Where the hell did you go Nina?" Madeline asked as she had a bottle in each hand.

"Your little sister let us in! Hope you don't mind!" Gailana had an opened bottle of tequila, taking a swig, those cute eyes tightening at the burn. "Wooooo!"

"… My sister."

"Yeah… she left a note on the table for you." Madeline stole Gailana's bottle and gave it her own funneling down her throat.

_Sis,_

_I let your friends in. I know the drill during party nights. Lock myself in my room, don't ask any questions, and don't listen to anything anyone says. I am happy you are having a good time. You won't hear anything out of me. _

_Love,_

_Anni_

Nina kept glancing at the note, trying to picture in her mind… her sister. No images were coming up at all.

"Alright Nina, we're already getting to buzzed land." Madeline poked her with a bottle. "Join us now! People are arriving in like ten minutes!"

"Get ahead of the game baby!" Gailana shouted louder than necessary into Nina's face, alcohol all over her breath.

"… I don't really feel like drinking." Nina made a face as she shooed it away. Madeline and Gailana gasped as if death had walked into the door.

"What? You were looking forward to this party for weeks! What's wrong with you?"

"I think we better fix Nina before she goes party pooper on us." Madeline suddenly grabbed Nina, and pulled her head back against her will. "Open wide sweetheart!"

"Madeline! N-no!" Nina shook her head, suddenly having her mouth forced open against her will and tequila dropped down her into throat. She felt the burning and the horrid taste instantly, almost gagging as she forced the alcohol down to breathe correctly. She gasped as it all went down.

"Yay… now do you feel better?" Gailana was proud of her pouring duties.

"I-I yuck… don't think so…" Nina pulled away bitterly, crouching a bit as she felt the warmth inside her. The alcohol was already starting to work. Maybe… she needed this to calm the hell down.

"Liar…" Madeline laughed at her statement. "Sorry we had to get rough there but you're worrying us fearless leader."

"No more help please…" Nina closed her eyes tightly, trying to shake off the taste.

"Now let's get you ready for the Nina Sayers pool party of the century!" Gailana smirks like a little girl ready to primp up a Barbie doll.

- B – B – B –

Her _friends _were right. Nina felt a little looser with that pulse of tequila running through her veins. She still didn't feel like partying but at least her mind was taking a break. The bikini was a bit much though as she stared at herself in the mirror. A classy all white number that of course showed off that lean body... that sexy body. Two piece swim suits don't leave much to the imagination. Maybe the Nina she was supposed to be… the one in the mirror was cool with it. But she wasn't.

She put on a big white t-shirt to cover herself up.

"NINA! COME ON!" She heard Veronica scream downstairs as those steps seemed like they went on forever. Nina pops her head into view, seeing a DJ spinning music inside her living room, the entire house rumbling now with hip hop music… that felt like everything else so out of her realm. Outside the penthouse was the pool deck where the party was happening... the number of people in her house increasing tenfold in about ten minutes.

"Hey Nina!" She heard all of them shout brokenly, waving for her to come over with childish exuberance. The youthful party goers were all out in bathing suits, splashing water, flirting, and ogling one another… ingesting alcohol like it was drinking water.

"Dude, what the hell is up with the t-shirt?" Veronica almost scolded her, the bikini clad girl walking over dripping pool water. "Get your ass in the pool party girl…"

"Well… I just thought-!" Nina felt her shirt pulled away as she was now one of them… revealingly dressed and ready to go. All the boys whistled as she tried to look normal… looking quite bashful instead. She thankfully didn't have too much time to let it sync in. She felt strong arms wrap around her waist, a young male lifting her up and carrying her over to the large pool area. "W-wait!"

_I don't want to jump…_

SPLASH!

Nina was underwater before she knew it, the cold pool taking her breath away as she struggled to get to the surface, grabbing onto the ledge in desperation. She almost felt like she drowned in seconds. Everyone was laughing as they began joining her though, canon balling, flipping, and diving into the pool making it look like the water was being bombarded with teens. Nina clung onto the side, wiping her face as she stared at the white and black clad group having so much fun… being teenagers.

Alcohol. Boys. And Girls. On the surface the sexual tension was ready to explode but for now it was playful flirting.

The way they all gracefully frolicked… it reminded Nina of birds in a lake.

_What… kind of birds?_

Before she could even ponder more, more groups began to pile in as Nina felt the pool crowding, people beginning to drink away and dance in the water. Almost all the boys take a look at her from the poolside, Nina shying away from eye contact as she knew they were checking her out. Clinging to the far side of the pool, this wasn't her place. This wasn't where she was supposed to be. What was she doing? … She needed more tequila.

"Alright, everyone! Toast to the exquisite Nina Sayers for a party we won't forget!"

All eyes peaked over to see a draw dropping image. Lily, in a black bikini would turn heads around three sixty. Nina knew she couldn't pull her eyes off this one. Suddenly everything didn't seem so strange anymore. Running her sights across a lean body of perfection wasn't troubling at all. She really didn't care.

"What's she doing here?" Veronica whispered.

"Who cares! Look at her!" Gailana was like everyone else staring away. "Hot momma…"

"I… invited her." Nina muttered as her closest girlfriends all blinked at her direction. The statement seemed surprising and to Veronica… even disturbing.

"To NINA!" All the people began to take their shots after a glass raise, Lily smiling as she downed a good amount of vodka in the first gulp.

"Alright let's get this party started. Anyone who needs a happy pill, you know where to find me!" Lily ran over with reckless abandon, flipping into the pool with a small splash, on cue it seemed the party erupting as water mixed with alcohol. Even with all the pandemonium and fun, Nina could only keep her sights on a focused and closed ring… Lily.

- B – B – B –

_This cause I swear  
Is the last time  
I trust myself with you._

The lights… the music. Nina didn't even remember what happened a few minutes ago as the alcohol levels kept increasing inside her body. She just saw pulsing lights and bodies pressed tightly against her, forcing her to dance so sexually. Hands around her waist, her naked skin for all to touch and feel. The minute she got self-conscious she shakes them off, gulping as even the alcohol didn't seem to make her feel at home in her… self. She was embarrassed to be doing these things… being so scandalous.

_Nina…_

_Don't think…_

_Just let it flow…_

_Nina..._

_Broken memories_ coming back. The feeling was so familiar. The music was so familiar… one big haze that only had one apparent clarity.

"Hey… Nina!"

The DJ reduced the beat down to a crawl. Nina felt almost as if time had slowed down itself, the lights swirling, the pool side water freezing in mid air, and the music slowing like a beast that needed to breathe for a second. The one who called her name was the only dame dressed in all black, waving at her from across the dance floor, moving in real time. Nina wouldn't even hesitate, moving away from the crowd and pushing her way towards Lily. She sees Lily disappear into the doorway… closely following behind.

"Do you know how to throw a party or what?" Lily closed the door behind them, locking it once Nina walked in.

"… I… what are you doing?"

"Well, I happened to stumble upon a sweet little Jacuzzi room you got here." The bikini clad beauty smiled… innocently… or… like a deviant. Nina just couldn't tell. "Just a little comfortable break before we go back out to raise more Hell."

Nina didn't even say a word as she watched Lily pass her with a seductive sweep, hips swaying and body all there for her to see. With Lily there was no question of her character. Nina… just felt something much more primal and real. Lily barely clothed turned her on more than anything could.

"I love a good Jetstream." Lily 'turned on' the jets to the rather large Jacuzzi, the steam already building up and for Nina it wasn't from the hot water. She slowly slides into the warm spa, groaning as the warmth surrounded her half naked body. A jet stream to her back and she looked like she was in heaven. "… Oh yeah… that's awesome… what's taking you so long princess? There's nothing to be afraid of… I don't bite."

Nervous or not, Nina took the playful invitation with a slow walk over to the wooden park, slowly sitting down in the bubbling water, feeling the hot steam and then water caress her body into calmness. The jet stream massaging her felt like heaven. She let out a moan… catching herself into the self-pleasure, stopping as she looked over to Lily who was quite content with the results.

"Finally you look a little relaxed…" Lily laughed as she pulled a bottle of Cristal from the side. "You look like you're feeling better. I saw you dancing with quite a few good looking guys madam."

"I… I did?" Nina found it hard to remember anything sober today. She found it hard to remember reflecting by herself. With Lily making her into a ball of nervousness it was nearly impossible.

"Talk to me Sayers… something's up with you."

"…"

"You were staring at me all day at school today." Lily's scanning eyes glanced Nina up and down like candy. "You like what you see or what?"

Nina just looked on silent as she made it look like she wanted to get up and leave. "I… don't want to talk about this."

"H-hey… you just… really need to relax."

_Relax…_

"I'm not trying to make you feel bad or anything." She suddenly waded over to Nina, making the confused girl's chest feel like it was about to explode. "… The exact opposite actually."

Nina saw Lily offer her a drink from her bottle of expensive alcohol, those eyes almost forcing Nina by themselves to take a good drink of it. The liquid courage could only help. Lily was making her so… nervous… but… comfortable. She shared the bottle that touched Lily's lips with no argument.

"Give me your back…"

After a long pause of disbelief Lily was going to get her way with just that stare. Nina didn't even fight this command either, slowly turning so she was looking away, Lily's fingers right on her shoulders instantly, working every tense knot that was in those muscles. A moan from Nina made her force down another drink.

"That's better Nina." Lily smiled as she saw her rival drink more, putting the bottle against the ledge. "Now I'm going to say… if you are just checking me out. I don't mind it. I kind of like it when hot girls check me out. It's fun."

"… I didn't say I was." Nina denied but groaned happily as she could just think about the wonderous massage she was getting.

"But you didn't say you weren't." Lily teased as she pressed away. "You look like you have so much stress." Her hands found their way to Nina's temples, rolling her fingers across them gently but firm.

"Oh yes…. Thank you…" Nina whispered as she finally felt someone try to take care of her headache for her.

"You're welcome…" Lily's eyes were so dark… was she being a friend? Something more? … Something worse?

"… I was staring at you because I don't know what's going on." Nina began to talk as the alcohol, the Jacuzzi, and Lily's hands were getting her so relaxed. "I feel like… I'm not me anymore."

"Uh, what's that supposed to mean?"

"… I-I don't know." Nina moaned as Lily's hands once again traveled down to her naked shoulder and neck. "I j-just feel like… nothing around me except you… is real-"

"Oh… I'm real." Lily muttered half listening.

Pouring her mental anguish out Nina half expected the nice conversation to continue. Lily had other plans though. This was confirmed when Nina suddenly felt her bikini top go loose; gasping as she saw the white top hit the Jacuzzi water. Instantly she felt hands around her, cupping her breasts, a warm breath to her neck. Lily was on her before she could even react.

"Lily… what are you doing…" Nina fluttered embarrassed, not believing she was being groped.

"Come on… you know you want this as much as I do." Lily squeezed so gently, lips right against Nina's ear now, whispering in such a sexual and demanding way. Nina let out an exasperated breath as her body felt so light like air.

"B-but… I thought you wanted… to talk and… to relax…" Nina felt her earlobe being nibbled on, slowly coming to her senses, her cheeks red as she turned to face Lily, covering herself in embarrassment.

"Really? That doesn't sound like fun at all… besides… I never said talk." Lily laughed lightly as her grip was broken, now slowly wading forward as Nina backed into the wall of the Jacuzzi. Her hand pulled Nina's hands away, looking at her naked chest quite happily. "Just relax Nina. Let me make you feel better…"

"Lily please I don't think… we should…" Nina didn't know what to say but stared at Lily's stalking fingers. She was 'walking' them across the Jacuzzi ledge, then onto Nina's right arm, and to her chest. She playfully stared at Nina as she began taking her fingers down below the water, caressing her naked stomach.

_**Lily's fingers traveled across the empty seat between them… the Taxi ride making her so impatient. Nina felt Lily's hand touch her where she wanted her to… or didn't want her to… feeling ecstasy.**_

"Lily… I said-"

"Shhh…" Lily's hands pushed Nina's bikini bottom aside, finding her destination. The motions next brought about the most pleasured gasps from Nina's lip almost instantly.

"L-lily… please..." Nina felt like her body was pulsing as her rival's fingers were rubbing her out, her clitoris making her insides hot. She couldn't fight Lily at all as she leaned back, feeling Lily's lips all over her neck and chest now, planting kisses and sucks all over her sweet skin. She closed her eyes tightly as she was succumbing to the burning pleasure inside. It only became more exciting as Nina felt something inside… penetrating her.

"Aaaaagh…"

Lily's fingers deep inside her made her yell out with eyes wide open and to the ceiling. Nina squirmed inside the tub as she felt the fingers move in and out rhythmically, holding onto Lily as she felt like sinking beneath the water. She pants uncontrollably as she stared at the reflection of herself from a mirror, eyes half closed and mouth agape. It felt so good… she needed it… she needed this.

_Just like… before?_

Nina's eyes expanded as she looked in the mirror now… noticing something she hadn't remembered seeing. A pair of etched wings across Lily's back, tattooed like a stigmatic symbol. Those… wings… meant something to her. Even with the thoughts she let out a shiver as Lily wriggled her fingers, pushing their mouths together a kiss. Nina was too shocked to fight the tongue that invaded her mouth… swearing the tattoos were moving. They both moaned.

_I've met you somewhere…_

"Have we done… this… before?" Nina gasped as she tried to breathe in between Lily's deep kissing.

"Maybe... I don't know…" Lily seemed just as excited as Nina, wanting to make her orgasm so badly she was speaking gibberish. Nina groaned into a deep kiss then gasped at another feeling… a feeling when images pop into her mind. A taxi cab. A club… A room… Lily.

"Unngh… w-who… are you?" Nina asked trying to pull away from the kiss.

"I'm anyone you want me to be…" Lily whispers almost unknowingly.

_A rival?_

_A friend?_

_A lover?_

"S-stop…" Nina was fighting the pleasure now… these images becoming so intense it was hurting her. Sex… was hurting her.

"Come on don't. I feel it coming. You're so close to exploding… let me go a little more." Lily kissed her cheek to calm her as Nina's mind and body were battling one another. Her body screamed for pleasure. Her mind…

_She just wants my body. She just wants sex. She just wants to use me. She's… setting me up._

_You want me to explode in ecstasy? Why?_

… _So you can just leave me sad and alone afterwards?_

"This is wrong." Nina suddenly grabbed Lily's pleasuring hand, pulling it away defiantly. Lily was in disbelief. "What's going on? Who are you?"

"What… the fuck Nina… I'm Lily."

"No! Who are you!" Nina held her hands, not letting her go anywhere. "We've met before. I know it… I swear to God I've met you before!"

_I won't waste myself on you.  
You…  
You…  
Waste myself… on you._

Nina kept seeing the same scene playing out. She watched herself drunk, holding hands with a girl as she ran away into her small room. The girl in front of her now... Lily… she had something to do with this. She fit the description. She fit… the pain.

"Are you crazy?" Lily broke free from her grip. "I just wanted to bone you and make you feel good. This is the thanks I get? Psycho much?"

"… I'm not crazy! I've just had enough!" Nina grabbed her bikini top, and was struggling to put it back on. "I'm tired of this! I want to know what's going on with me!"

Lily just stared at her… speechless for the first time.

"We've done this before… this is something I can't forget." Nina looked into her eyes with a serious glare, a firey stare. "Don't you lie to me too! Please… Lily… you're the only one that makes any sense… Don't be like everyone else…"

"Uh, m-maybe I should get out of here." Lily looked at Nina as she was crazy, slowly backing away.

"You… and I had sex… and you left me." Nina held her head, slumping against the ledge… even the Jacuzzi not warming her anymore. "You left me… I know… you did. As painful as it is. Please tell me this happened."

"uh, look you must got me confused with someone else Nina." Lily began to get out of the pool with worried eyes. "I don't ever fuck that drunk… I don't think."

"Damn it! Why is everyone lying to me?" Nina muttered as she began to tear up. She knew something was off. This… all of this wasn't right. Lily was supposed to be the only one that understood. She… was lying.

"… Fuck Nina… I came here for sex and you're going to make me be your shoulder to cry on?" Lily rolled her eyes. "Get a grip… you have everything people dream of. Money. Love. Popularity. Beauty. Now you're making up shit to complain about?"

"Just go away!" Nina suddenly exploded at her, making Lily back up a few steps from the surprising intensity. "You're just like everyone else! Leave me like you did before!"

_Using me… _

_They all use me until I'm worthless…_

"F-fine, I don't need this shit alright?" Lily grabbed her things angrily and began to walk out with a pompous step, leaving Nina alone in the Jacuzzi. She hears Nina begin to cry as she reaches the door, stopping for just a second. Nina's eyes were deep into her own arms, sobbing. Lily… felt strange.

"Ugh, fuck me…" Lily growled to herself as she breathed slowly and hesitantly. "Look Nina um… uh…"

"… What?" Nina whimpered.

"S-sometimes it's best just to take things as it is ya know? Uh… um…"

Nina's ears twitched at… truthful words that had a hard time coming out.

"… S-sometimes the truth? Isn't worth uncovering. J-just be happy okay?" As the mysterious dark girl said it with a soft finish, Lily stared at her reflection in the glass of the door, almost not even knowing why she said those words. She didn't look like she even recognized herself.

"Don't ruin this perfect life because of doubts…"

_Doubts…_

Nina sat up straight with red watery eyes as she turned towards Lily wanting to speak… only to see an empty doorway.

_Something's not right. I knew it… _

Lily had just confirmed it.

_Trying not to break  
but I'm so tired of this deceit.  
Every time I try to make myself  
Get back on my feet. _

_All I ever think about is this  
All the tiring time between  
And how trying to put my trust in you  
Takes so much out of me… _

_

* * *

_

**A/N: **Thank you my reviewers... :)

I've been so bummed out about the Japan tsunami and earthquake situation... I think I speak for everyone when I say, Japan is awesome... and Japanese culture is awesome.


	3. Laid to Rest

**A/N: **Dark dark... dark... be warned.

* * *

**Chapter Three: Laid to Rest**

"_Was it… partly my fault? I feel… guilty Nina."_

_If there was a single day I could live  
A single breath I could take  
I'd trade all the others away..._

Nina's eyes shot open again like flash, almost as if she had appeared from nothing. The last thing she remembered was Lily and the warmest water, and even then she didn't know how long that was ago. She didn't know if it was a dream or a memory, what happened... at the party. Lily gave her some sort of warning. Some sort of advice… was it real? Was anything… real?

Nina notices a clock. She notices a blackboard. She notices students and desks. She knew she was at school yet again. It was a bit early though with no teacher in sight and the students were being their normal chatty selves. A conversation between ditzy blondes was brewing behind her as Nina tried to listen. Whenever Lily's name was mentioned… she'd always listen in.

"Damn Kate, did you hear_ Lily_ got expelled yesterday?"

"Yeah… no kidding. I wonder what she did. I kind of always knew that girl was trouble."

_Lily expelled?_

"She must have been selling drugs or something. She's just bad news."

"What are you two talking about?" Nina turned back to them almost angrily. She was almost defending Lily from accusations.

"Oh… Nina… yeah, it's going all around the school. Lily's out apparently."

"T-that's not right. How? Why?" Nina gasped as she felt unease inside her.

"Uh… we're not su-"

Nina didn't wait for a bullshit answer. She suddenly got up from her chair, taking her bookbag and bolted to the door in a frenzied hurry.

"Good morning cla-Whooooa!" Mrs. Jackson was pushed aside as Nina stormed out of the classroom in a desperate look. She tried to gather her thoughts as she remembered yesterday that Lily gave her a number to call. Nina pressed the buttons to get to Lily in her phonebook, almost fumbling the cellphone in the process. The rings came slow and repetitive as she rested her cell against her head. All that happened was a voice message box.

_Hi leave a message for Lily at the beep… beep! … Oh wait it does it for you already. Never mind! _

"Lily! Please call me back!" Nina shouted into the phone. "I have to talk to you! Why aren't you here anymore? Please… you have to help me! I need help!"

The silence on the other end spoke louder than words. Nina hung up almost in frustration, the only clue to what she was feeling not even near her or on the premises. She needed to talk to Lily again. Nina looked back at the class wondering if she should stay but kept hearing the word doubt in Lily's voice shake her conscience. She knew it deep down, it wasn't right. She had enough of this and was determined to stop whatever she was feeling. This would end… now. There was something she knew that sat wrong more than anything else she'd experienced.

_My sister…_

- B – B – B –

The subway ride home was in silence and in a big crowd, Nina being one with the flow, the way she only knew how. Her calmness ended when she stormed into her _home _however. She needed to rattle this cage. "Anni! Anni! Where are you?"

"My goodness, Nina what has gotten into you?" Erica Sayers peered over from the kitchen.

"Where is she? Where is my sister you keep telling me I have?" Nina shouted.

"Will you calm down? Why are you shouting?"

"Because this is all a lie!" Nina pointed at Erica. "You're not the mother I know! This isn't my life! Something's wrong!"

"Nina, are you crazy? What's gotten into you?"

_**Where's my sweet girl?**_

Nina held her head, grimacing as a migraine was starting to feel like it was splitting her mind apart. Her frustration was growing regardless. Her patience was dwindling either way. She was getting… angry.

"Stop playing dumb with me!" Nina looked a bit… psychotic. "Where's my sister?"

"S-she's at school like you're supposed to be!"

"… I am not supposed to be in school." Nina suddenly took off for the stairs. "Where is her room? I want to see her room!"

"Nina! CALM DOWN! I need to take you to doctor! You need help!"

"STAY AWAY!" Nina ran up the stairs, desperately looking around the large penthouse for a clue to her sister's room. She kept looking through door after door until finally finding one that just didn't fit the pattern. The nice woods that were on every other door… wasn't the same as this one. It was decrepit. It was faded. It was rusted at the knob. And it had no lock.

_Don't throw away this perfect life…_

"NINA! DON'T GO INTO YOUR SISTERS ROOM! STOP!"

The warnings fell on deaf ears. Nina trembled in anger as she grabbed the door knob and swung the door open, the dark room ahead waiting for her every curious fury. There was a coldness she hadn't felt anywhere else… but it felt right. She stepped into the room with no hesitation, finding the light and flipping it on. The sight in front of her made her skin crawl but there was no regret. It made her heart feel cold but it made her feel… at home. Pink. Butterflies. A small bed. A broken music box…

"Why did you come in when mommy said not to?"

Nina couldn't hear herself breathe anymore as she heard that voice. It sounded like something dark. It sounded like something sinister. It sounded like something… like her.

"Mommy loves us here. But you're not happy here either sister?"

_The bloods on the wall  
So you might as well just admit it  
And bleach out the stains  
Commit to forgetting it_

Nina gulped as she turned slowly like she didn't want to, looking into a mirror image that made her want to vomit. She saw a naked body tattered and torn… bleeding from curdling sores all over. The girl's back had two bleeding scars down her shoulder blades. Her fingers looked like they had been peeled straight to the bone. Her toes all seemed raw to the flesh, cracked cuticles and all. Her face was not in pain. Nina's face was not in pain. _She _was used to it.

On the mirror written randomly all over in… lipstick? … In blood?

_ANIN… NNIA… NNAI… ANI… A N… I… NA…. A… N… A… N… I… N….A…. _

_ANNI…_

Nina only began to cry as she stared at the girl writing on the mirror, knowing who it was inside. The bleeding being careened her face with the most accusing eyes, her head cracking with each movement like it had been wrenched by a repetitive motion. Her entire body was moving and contorting like a living corpse.

"Why are you not happy sister?" Anni whispers weakly like wind, eyes as dead as night. "Everyone loves us here. Everyone cares for us here. Are you not happy living where I live?"

"… I…" Nina couldn't even speak as she leaned back against the wall, suddenly feeling the door to her left slam so hard it cracked. "AAH!"

"Do you not love being here sister?" Anni touched her cold doll like face to comfort herself, smearing the irony crimson fluid across her pale skin. "Do you not love me? I didn't complain. I stood silent in my room, locked in here. Why are you not happy?"

Nina wanted to back up anywhere, she wanted to scream but she couldn't even move right. She tried to make a break for the exit but suddenly a metal rod shot into the wood, stabbing it and forcing it shut. Nina tripped into the wall and began screaming as she hammered at the door, yelling at the top of her lungs.

"MOMMY! HELP ME! PLEASE!"

Nina heard the heavy footsteps get closer and was now maniacally slamming the door like a wounded animal, pleading from someone to save her from this... monster. It was closing in so methodically and calmly, creeping up with a foul rotting stench. Anni began to limp, her bloodied body in so much pain, her entire form shaking from head to toe, the walking dead pulling herself closer to Nina. "Maybe… we can never be happy together. Maybe I shouldn't be locked up…"

Nina tried to scream again but let out only air as she felt a cold wet hand press up against her neck soon after, smearing blood all over her perfect skin. Her smooth white new skin. All that red blood against her white complexion was making Nina feel hypnotized. She was so frozen… and helpless. Those fingers digging deeper into her... pressing so tight against her. Those nails could pierce her delicate self any second.

"Why can't you be happy with me?" Anni whispers softly into her ear, running her lips across Nina's cheek in a caring nuzzle. "Why can't you be happy with perfection?"

Anni grabbed Nina's shaking hands and forced her to touch her body, every scar and open wound that never healed being felt. Peeling her finger skin off. Cracking her toes. Wearing her feet out to the bone. Scratching her back raw. This was… all her doing. How did she do this to… herself? Her memories were becoming clearer. More frightening…

"I only see one way for us to be happy now." Anni's cold eyes met with Nina, forcing her to look into them. "Perhaps you feel angry and want to release it… perhaps… we need to end… ourselves for good."

"N-no… please… I… just let me… wake up…" Nina felt her mouth being shut forcibly by Anni, not even letting her breath. She felt her jaw being squeezed, pain making her eyes water. This had to be… a nightmare.

"Shhh… go to sleep sister… I love you… I know what you need now. I won't let _them_ hurt you anymore… we will be happy together… forever…"

The blood drizzled onto her from above as she was falling to her knees. She was becoming wet. Wet… with crimson fluids.

_You're better off empty and blank_  
_Then left with a single pathetic trace of this_  
_Smother another failure_  
_Lay this to rest_

- B – B – B –

"NO!" Nina shot out of a water tub, splashing water around, couching as she was drowning. She shot a cycled glare around the bathroom as if a ghost would appear, seeing nothing but the foggy air around her from a hot bath. Did she just have a nightmare while falling asleep in water?

She felt at her body. Her grown up… body. The body she knew and didn't feel like an alien in. She reached around her back feeling the scars she knew she had. Nina knew she must have been dreaming now, leaning her head back against the tub as her wet hair dripped onto the cold floor. This was her bathroom… this was her home. She could finally breathe a little bit.

It was such a relief to feel right. Nina stood up from the bath relieved, grabbing a towel and wiping herself down. She uses the towel to wipe the mirror, slowly uncovering the mirror image she recognized. There was only one problem.

_I'm not… moving…how… am I-_

"This feels good. This body." Her reflection mused as she tilted her head like a lost child, making Nina do the same. Nina gasped with every move that wasn't hers, her body not reacting to anything she told it to do. She wanted to step away… the mirror image told it to stand still. She wanted to look away… the mirror image told those eyes to stay put. Nina was looking at someone she recognized but it wasn't her at all.

"How does it feel sis?" _Anni _smiled at her image, touching herself around her body quite sensually enjoying the feeling of… feeling as if she never did before. Nina could only grimace as this nightmare was spiraling downward... just like those hands "How does it feel… to only be a reflection?"

"W-why are you doing this to me?" Nina shouted as she felt her own hands_ touch_ herself.

"I'm here to make you happy sister… by any means possible." _Anni_ giggled, the laughter echoing in Nina's mind. "Those that hurt you… must be punished. I won't let them hurt you anymore…"

After a content self-fondling, Nina felt herself clean her face with cold water. She saw herself comb her hair. She saw herself put on makeup. She saw herself dressed up… in black. She saw herself smiling at… evil thoughts. The other girl… that she kept seeing in her memories… that she kept seeing in other people. She was staring and talking to that girl.

"It's my turn now…" _Anni_ licked her lips quite happily, blowing a kiss to Nina, suddenly things going black and hazy.

- B- B- B –

Nina felt herself walking towards the doorway, fuzzily moving like a blur. She didn't know if she was looking through her own eyes… or from another perspective. Her mind was all over the place. She hears a voice yell out at her in a recognizable echo. It was a disappointed voice. A voice she put a lot of memories under pain for…

"Nina! You're not going out! It's too late! Get back in your room!"

Nina tried to reply but there was no answer. Someone else… had her.

"… Shut up."

"W-what did you say?"

"I SAID SHUT UP!" Nina screamed as she turned back to her mother. "Do me a favor and stay out of my life you fucking noisy bitch!"

"N-nina... how dare you speak to me that way!"

"Oh I'm sorry…" _Anni_ in black smiled so wickedly, she caused Erica to back away. "Did I offend my _mommy._ The one who pretends to support me but wishes I fail so I can't leave the nest?"

"W-what?"

"Did I offend my _mommy_… the one that makes me feel so guilty that I want to die every time I displease her?"

"…"

"Did I offend my _mommy… _the one that doesn't give a shit about how I feel and only cares about herself?"

"NINA STOP!"

"NO!" _Anni_ had her up against the wall. "Let's talk mommy! Let's have a good family discussion!" She hissed playfully. "Why don't you tell me how much you hate me because I am living your dream? Tell me that I'm not good enough to succeed my own dreams. Tell me that you only keep me around to make yourself have any worth!"

SMACK! Erica suddenly slapped Nina hard out of reaction… the real Nina feeling the sting of it. _Anni_ only smiled as she turned back. "Tell me I'm the reason why daddy left you all alone…"

"Nina how can you say this about me! I raised you! I gave up everything for you!"

"… You're a delusional psychotic bitch like me. Live with it or die with it… you're no use to me." Nina's words were like knives. "You've fucked with my head long enough. It's all your fault! Get out of my life… FOREVER!"

Erica began to cry and scream as Nina walked off, smiling evilly. She passes a mirror, the mirror image of the real Nina in tears as well… not believing what she said to her mother. She loved Erica… no matter what she did. Why was she being so heartless? This wasn't Erica's fault Nina was… this way. Not completely her fault!

"Don't leave me Nina! PLEASE! I need you!"

_I DON'T WANT TO MOM! IT'S NOT ME! DON'T LISTEN! HEAR ME!_

"You need a clue old lady and don't bother waiting up tonight." _Anni_ cackled evilly as she opened the door. "Your sweet little girl is gone for good."

The door slammed shut in the silence… Erica looking like a shell of an already damaged woman left behind. Nina's reflection was still in the mirror but she was as hopeless as Erica was, her own mother couldn't see her. Nina watches her mother walk to the kitchen… grabbing a knife… and slowly walking to the bathroom. Nina was horrified the instant she saw her face. She was beside herself. In the reflection she could only scream helplessly.

"MOMMY! I LOVE YOU! DON'T!" Nina kept banging on the door. "MOMMY PLEAAASE!"

Nina heard something hit the floor like a limp body… her eyes watering up as she smashed herself against the doorway, sliding down with no sense of warmth in her human body. She felt so cold. Her mother… was dead. She… killed herself.

"M-mommy…" She whimpered like a child, clutching the wall as she laid on the ground. "T-this... I didn't want this…" She cried. "She didn't deserve this! Why!"

_Don't worry sister. She won't hurt us anymore…_

_Console yourself…  
You're better alone…  
Destroy yourself…  
See who gives a Fuck… _

- B - B – B –

Outside of a local liquor store sat a lonely and beaten old dancer, tossed aside like trash. She has hard alcohol hidden in a brown bag as she drinks her pains away, Nina being forced to stare from behind a reflective mirror of a window, already empty and in pain from what she had felt and seen. Her mother… was gone… what was happening now? Was it more… of the horrible reality… she left behind?

"Wow, Beth, what a small world."

Beth McIntire hears the usually soft voice become so confident, taking a swig of her drink before turning, showing her messed up make up and destroyed mind. She laughs to herself. "What the fuck are you doing here Nina?"

"Just walking around and admiring the view." _Anni_ smiled so pretty as she stood there, only darkness inside her. "Everything's so great when you're the Queen… but of course at some point in time you knew that right?"

"Jokes? You got a lot of nerve kid. I was fucking twirling my ass off while you were still in elementary school!"

"So you're old. Big deal." _Anni_ shrugged, laughing at her. "You have a lot of nerve accusing me of sucking cock when we all know how many you've blown to stay Swan Queen so long. Dancing horribly there had to be an explanation…"

"You little bitch! You ungrateful bitch! There'd be no production if it wasn't for me!"

"Oh I don't know about that Beth." _Anni_ sighed. "You're one in a million. Another pretty whore that Thomas fucked and left out to dry."

"FUCK YOU SAYERS!" Beth swung her bottle at Nina, only to have her armed grabbed and the drink pulled away.

"Look at you… so pathetic." _Anni_ shoved her, making her stumble towards the sidewalk. "To think I used to look up to you. You're making me sick."

"You take away my part. You take away my Thomas… now you're taking away every bit of respect I had left." Beth wanted to cry as she stood there. "Why are you taking everything away from me! You're supposed to be frigid and weak!"

"Because I can and because life is cruel to the elderly." _Anni_ insulted as she took a drink of the hard liquor only to spit it at Beth's face. Beth gasped as her eyes were burning, Nina grabbing her by her jacket. "They say never meet your heroes… I guess I should've listened…"

_No, what are you doing now! PUT HER DOWN!_

"You don't deserve anything. I praised you and you disappointed me." _Anni_ suddenly saw a car coming by, tossing Beth out there like a piece of meat. The real Nina heard the breaks engage, then the tire screech… and then a bone crushing collision that made her self feel pain.

_BETH!_

Beth was alive but barely conscious crying out in agony as her legs were totally immobile. _Anni_ has that same sadistic mile, walking off into the darkness as she leaves the scene, not leaving a trace. Nina could only yell out as she became the reflection inside the car, looking around to anyone that would help.

_Please someone! Anyone! Call 911! Help her!_

"Why did you do… that to me Nina?" Beth seemed to be whispering to the reflection.

"I didn't… want to. No! You're my hero! I never wanted to hurt you! I didn't want to take anything from you!"

"Liar…" Beth fainted with that last whisper, blood running down her lip.

_Anni… stop… stop… JUST STOP!_

_Absorb yourself  
You're better alone  
Destroy yourself_

- B - B – B –

In the girl's restroom Veronica followed a happy and celebratory Nina in, hoping to give this liar of a girl a piece of her mind. She didn't appreciate the false hope Nina gave her, making sure that the newly announced Swan Queen would now feel the tension at every waking moment as the lead. She grabs a lipstick and began to write the word WHORE on the mirror. To her surprise glancing into the glass… she sees a black dressed Nina right behind her, watching her ammused.

"So, what'cha doing there fellow dance mate?"

Veronica turned with a stiff smirk. "Just writing what I think of you on the bathroom mirror. Thanks for asking."

"How juvenile of you." _Anni_ grinned back at her. "I guess I shouldn't expect anything more than that from you huh Veronica?"

"Fuck you…"

"What? So I can be like the other 90 percent of the ballet ensemble?" _Anni_ hissed. "No thanks…"

"You give my hopes up and now you're insulting me. You're fucking unbelievable!"

"It's not my fault that you weren't as good as I thought you were. Why don't you blame your ugly face and your bitchy attitude instead of me?"

"Oh I'm going to screw you up Nina!"

Veronica dove at Nina, only to have her arm wrenched and pushed so hard against the glass it cracked, cutting her cheek. "AAAH!"

"No… you screwed yourself, just like you did to your path to stardom." _Anni_ pressed her face into the glass, making her cry out, suddenly tossing her to the floor. Veronica's face was mangled… in no shape to be on stage.

"M-my face… what did you do?" Veronica's face was a split image of beauty and… horror.

"You're all two faced. You smile when I walk by but you talk shit about me behind my back." Nina walked passed her with no pity. "Let's see you dance that way now. You don't deserve any of this you selfish fucking girls. ALL OF YOU ARE SELFISH!"

"You're the star! AGH! How dare you take away our dreams! You hypocrite!"

"Go cry to Thomas while you beg to him…" Nina ignored angrily as she walked out the restroom.

"We're just like you! How can you talk shit like that about us! YOU ARE ONE OF US!"

_I am… just one of you… I have no… right… to be selfish… they don't deserve this!_

_Please Anni! I can't take it anymore…_

"Oh but we need to finish one more person off sister." _Anni_ whispers as she peaked into the main dance hall, watching a pretty girl with earphones on her walk off. Nina clenched her fist tightly as she watched those pair of wings walk by. Lily…

"The one that started our fall…" Anni growled. "She must… pay…"

_No… please… no! Not Lily! Not her! I won't… let you… hurt her!_

_I'll chain you to the truth!  
For the truth shall set you free.  
I'll turn the screws of vengeance!  
And bury you with honesty. _

-B – B – B –

It was willpower she didn't know she had. Nina screamed out as she felt herself jolt back into consciousness, for the first time feeling her body being her own. She glanced down being in a black dress, standing outside the club, glancing into a watery window, looking at the pretty rival she called Lily laying back in a drug filled smile. She didn't waste a second as she tried to walk into the club, seeing a few groups walk out, blocking her way.

Nina didn't let her eyes off Lily. She had to warn her.

Apparently… she was too late.

"W-what… but…" Nina whispers as she sees… herself leaning against Lily's shoulder, eyes closed.

"Come on Nina… time to dance..."

Lily pulled _Anni _away, Nina watching hopelessly as she fought through the crowds to catch up. She swears she saw Anni open her eyes looking right at her, being perfectly conscious and not drugged. Those eyes were red… Swan eyes. And she winked at Nina with a sadistic smile.

"LILY!" Nina tried to shout over the dance music but she had no luck. Somehow and someway, she willed herself to have some self-control. She wasn't going to waste this moment. Lily didn't deserve whatever her darker self had in store. No one from her past life deserved anything that was happening but Lily held a special place in her heart… for some reason.

Nina battled through the dancing crowd, through the pulsing colors that flashed from black to strange images. She got lost in the crowd, seeing butterfly patterns, lesbians, gays, straight… and monsters. She doesn't even care for her own safety as she barrels her eyes across every horror, seeing Lily flash around the dance floor like she was everywhere. She had to really concentrate, calmly looking around, noticing her other and Lily making out in the corner, pushing themselves into the public bathroom.

"LILY! DON'T!" Nina pushed off anything that got into her way, scaling her way into the bathroom inch by inch. Through sheer will she busted the door down, stepping inside expecting to see Lily but was met with an empty room, only a reflection of a darker Nina making out passionately with Lily, tongues flaring out like snakes.

"Damn it! Anni! Don't do it!" Nina ran to the mirror and thumped it a few times. "Lily run! Don't trust her!"

_She can't hear you. Anni _thought as Lily was kissing her neck. _She deserves to die. She wants to steal our spot light. She wants to trick us. She's our enemy…_

"No she's not! Stop it! You're not me! Stop pretending to be me!" Nina shouted as she kept trying to warn Lily, smashing the mirror as if she could break through.

"H-hey do you hear something Nina?" A rolled Lily looked up, only to be silenced by Anni's tongue. "Mmmm…"

"God damn it…" Nina hit it one more time, gasping as a splinted of glass fell down on her side, cutting her wrist. "Aagh…"

On the other side, _Anni _sees the bladed glass drop and chuckles in thanks to her 'sister', grabbing it as she was French kissing her rival to a euphoric state. Nina was horrified as she could only watch helplessly. Within a second Lily was yelling out in agony as the blade went right through her stomach, blood running down her mouth and clothes as she stared into the eyes of her killer.

"W-why..?" Lily gasped, spitting out blood.

"… You tried to set me up bitch." _Anni _growled. "Well look who's the fool now Lily?" She jammed it in harder. "I outsmarted you. I outplayed you. You conniving little skank!"

"Unngh… no… I didn't… want to take… anything…"

"YOU LIE!" _Anni _angrily tossed her to the ground.

"Stop it! She's telling the truth!" Nina screamed as Lily was limp in seconds, forming a pool of blood on the floor. "No! NO!" She screeched as she tossed herself into the wall, screaming at the pain welling up inside her. Her spirit was about to snap. She couldn't take this pain anymore. Not Lily… not her mother…

"Why are you sympathetic towards her? Are you mad sister?" _Anni _glanced over.

"… She didn't do anything wrong… somehow… I know it…" Nina whispers, holding herself as the room was getting so cold. "None of these people deserve any pain from me… I'll gladly… take all the pain… I don't want to hurt anyone…"

"You don't know what you're talking about sister… you're the one killing them too." _Anni _suggested with a grumble as she grabbed Lily's legs and dragged it towards a nearby stall, leaving a streak of red on the floor.

Nina opened her eyes, gagging almost as she saw the bladed glass in her palm, running blood down her entire grasp. She turns to look at the bathroom stall seeing a streak leading to the same one Lily was dragged into in the mirror. Suddenly she saw blood leak out of the bottom like a pool. Nina flashes the memories back into her mind, grimacing as she had to check... just like at some sort of Opening Night.

She grabbed the door handle, pulling herself up, and opening it… a sight that made her gag and cough… the stench of a dead rotting corpse too much.

Lily was dead… and rotting.

"Damn you Anni… damn you…" Nina crumpled onto all fours, not being able to go on any longer, literally gagging herself to suffocation.

"You curse me sister… why? I am only looking out for you…"

"I'm so messed up…" Nina's tears ran down her eyes, coughing. "That's why… Lily didn't want me to know the truth… all of these… are my memories… this is my living nightmare… that I can't wake up from. This is my reality…"

"Don't worry sister. We will have bliss soon. You just need to trust me…" _Anni _suddenly screamed like a demon as she slammed into the glass, making Nina's eyes pop up. Slowly she was breaking away the barrier… pushing shattered glass aside, a bleeding hand smashing through the mirror itself. "It's time we die… and be together… forever sister."

"N-no… no!" Nina got up, finding a second wind and began to ran as hard as she could, bursting out the room. She was panting and weak but she didn't care. This isn't the way it ended. This wasn't the way she wanted this to end. In the club's darkness she felt alone, not being able to see a thing as the pulsing colors were slowed down. She hears a voice yelling at her… not knowing who it was. She feels a strong arm grab her… wrapping that grasp around her waist.

_FAILURE…_

- B – B – B –

"PLEASE NO!"

"Nina! Nina! It's me Thomas! What's wrong?"

"I… I…" Nina calmed down instantly, staring into his strong blue eyes made it easy. The fact that she was being held by him protectively didn't help either. His strong grasp and firm grip made her feel… safe. She looked around again, being in the old room at the penthouse, decked out in rich ware. Her pain was gone… but she was a younger girl again. In that dream world…

"You must have had a nightmare. My poor little princess." Thomas' accent cut through, stroking Nina's hair away from her sweaty face.

"I… had the worst nightmare." Nina gulped, feeling so weak she didn't care where this was as long as she was safe. "That… I was killing everyone… or hurting them. People I loved… people that didn't deserve it."

"Well you're safe now." Thomas kept her close. "Your mother got so frightened that she called me to come over and help talk to you. She says you've gone… crazy."

_Crazy…_

"I am not… crazy…" Nina tried to sit up, only to be pinned… his eyes weren't so comforting anymore. "Thomas… what are you doing?"

"Your mother is out to get medicine… I've been waiting for her to leave us alone for the longest time." Thomas suddenly pressed his strong lips into Nina's, forcing them into a kiss.

"Mmmph.. T-thomas!" Nina shook. "What are you doing? Y-you l-love my mother don't you?"

"Huh, y-you never usually complain about this." Thomas looked at her quite strange. "Perhaps your mother was right… either way… I need you now my little princess." He began feeling up her young girl's body, one hand at her firm rear, stroking towards her inner thigh, the other at her breast groping. Nina gasped a she couldn't believe it… she was being molested... and closed to being raped by someone she was supposed to trust.

"No! Thomas! Please… not you too!" Nina was silenced by his strength and size, feeling his hardness grow against her own treasured area. He was supposed to be her mentor. Someone who protected her.

"Quiet my little princess… just enjoy what I'm about to do." Thomas began unbuttoning her white pajamas, Nina watching on as her eyes spoke of her helplessness. She tried to struggle but it only got more painful Thomas grip. She felt her budding breast fondled as his mouth found its way onto her gnawing roughly.

"Oooh please… no more…" Nina was on her last string of sanity, flashes of feathers just pouring into her mind… black feathers.

Thomas unzipped himself as he pulled Nina's undergarments away, preparing to enter her sacred spot. From afar Nina watched the mirror manipulating itself, seeing her tormentor smiling down with an innocent smile.

"Feel our prince make love to us…" _Anni _laughed playing with a glass blade against her neck. "One last pleasure for you sister… before we die…"

Nina let out a loud cry as she was entered, silenced only by Thomas' mouth. She bit down on his lip out of reaction, causing him to wince, pulling back. "Y-you bit me? Fuck you bit me!" It didn't stop him. He only seemed to grow angrier, holding her down and riding her relentlessly. Nina felt pleasure… but mostly pain as her tears mixed with her moans, closing her eyes as she couldn't watch. He was so big… and she was so tight.

_I can't go on… this isn't worth… living for…_

It was over… she just wanted to die at this point.

"HEY FRENCHIE!"

"Huh?" Thomas turned around, suddenly only to be hammered with a biker's helmet, sending him collapsing to the ground with a shattered nose. Nina whimpered as she felt the member inside her leave, grimacing and crying. Lily admired her swing from above, smirking at a knocked out Thomas.

"What! What are you doing here?" _Anni _screamed in the reflective mirror, staring at a black clad Lily in her biker uniform.

"Someone's head is getting a little clearer…" Lily suddenly tossed her biker's helmet into the mirror as hard as she could, shattering it into a million pieces, _Anni _screaming in an anger she couldn't control.

"L-lily ?" Nina sobbed as she tried to stand, feeling so weak and drained. Lily didn't even reply, going through her closet, finding a robe and going over to put it on her.

"You told me you needed help on the phone message… didn't really think it'd be this bad to be honest." Lily wrapped the robe around Nina's body, helping her up. "You have to trust me Nina. I gotta get you out of here now."

"You came back to help me… you're alive…" Nina gasped, holding onto Lily… her crutch. Her support.

"For now… yeah." Lily began moving fast, holding Nina tight. "I know you feel like you're about to keel over, but you can't give up okay?"

"… Just hold onto me… I won't let you down…"

"Good girl… now let's move." Lily rushed out the door and down the hallway. "Your head… is one fucked up place huh?"

In a broken shard… the image of the dark Nina was not amused in the least bit… her face shifting into a dark Queen. A black burned and torqued crown seated on a devil's head. Swans. The White Swan was getting away with her prince…

The Black Swan wasn't happy…

"There's nowhere to run this time Nina… we both know where this ends…"

_I'll make all your dreams come to life.  
And slay them as quickly as they came.  
Smother another failure  
Lay this to rest_


	4. Requiem

"_If you don't wake up… I'll never be able to forgive myself. I can't play a part in something like this. Do this… for me."_

_Look at me  
You may think you see,  
Who I really am.  
But you'll never know me.  
Every day, is as if I play apart.  
Now I see,  
If I wear a mask  
I can fool the world  
But I cannot fool  
My heart…_

Nina knew that the act of waking up was never supposed to be _this _scary. Blurry memories had taken its toll on a broken mind. When she awoke… Nina just wanted to close her eyes shut and fall into unconsciousness again. She desperately needed a break but she didn't know exactly from what.

She felt a body next to her, a warm hugging entity that she was too frightened to look at. The voice was startling. She just wasn't ready for anymore surprises.

"_How was last night for you…?"_

"YAAAH!"

KATHUMP!

"W-what? Ow! Damn it!"

Nina sat up from her bed so fast like lightning, clutching at her bed sheets as she spun her head around like a swivel. She sees blurs of pink and white, scrambling to her left to prepare and defend herself.

"Jesus what the hell is wrong with you?"

_Lily?_

"Lily?" Nina held her heaving chest, her bra covered chest, quickly taking her sheet and covering herself at the first realization of her half naked body. Next she noticed Lily wasn't clothed too much either, a skimpy black number barely on her. She was caught staring and was too surprised to even care.

"Yes… that's my name… God… my ass…" Lily held her panty covered bottom as she was on the floor, looking at Nina with a headshake. "Why is your bed the size of like a little kid's anyway? You already take up all the space and you're a stick!"

"W-what are you doing here?" Nina asked as she looked around, confirming it… to be her room. The room… she was familiar with.

"We had sex and I stayed over." Lily grumbled simply, as she pulled herself up. "Don't mind me… I'll just get up myself."

_You stayed… over?_

"Oh I am so sorry." Nina held her head for just a second, reaching over and pulling Lily up by her arm and back onto the bed. A black scantily clad Lily sat there, shaking off the rude awakening, Nina once again left with a puzzle that wasn't coming together. She was sitting with her rival? … Her friend? Her… sex partner? What… was going on?

"It's okay Nina… really though you need to get a bigger bed. And a room that doesn't look like it belongs to Miley Cyrus when she was five."

Nina looked at Lily like she was an aberration, seeing images flashback like tattered photographs.

"We… went to a club… I took drugs… you and I went back home…and we had sex…"

Lily rubbed her rear at the simple paraphrase. "Yes and you woke up screaming like a little crazy freak…" she smiled soon after. "I guess it was worth it though. You got so freaky last night let me tell you… didn't know Ms. your highness had it in her…"

"So… you… stayed over…"

_You woke me up…_

"Do you want me to leave or something?" Lily blinked.

"N-no." Nina said it almost in a whisper… then a slow smile. "No… I didn't."

This wasn't like the other times she woke up. She felt… safe.

"Good." Lily stretched her lean arms, yawning loudly. "Anyway, we better get ready to get out of here. Thomas is going to fry both our asses if we're late." She paused. "Well actually probably only me but whatever right?"

_Why didn't you wake me up?_

… _Did you have a wet lezzie dream about me?_

"R-right… we have to dance ballet… today."

"Yes… and we are ballerinas…" Lily laughed at Nina's robotic answers. "You got a hangover. How cute."

Nina didn't feel a thing actually, not even wanting to explain what she was feeling to Lily. She took a peak over to see their clothes on the ground, remembering faintly how they got there.

Lily waltzed over and bent down, grabbing her outfit, dressing right in front of Nina without a shame in the world. A vision of a dream. Thoughts of a dream? A body that Nina wanted so badly was apparently hers last night. It was nice to have one last glimpse at it… before it was covered up again.

"I'm swinging back home to shower. I guess I'll see you at practice later?"

"Y-yeah… sure…" Nina stood up slowly not really used to feeling so 'normal', blankets still draped across her body, still feeling embarrassed subconsciously. Her memories felt right… it was almost like whatever happened before (whatever _before_ was…) meant nothing…

"Will you just get some clothes on already?" Lily grabbed the blankets and pulled it away shamelessly, looking at Nina's half naked body extremely interested. Nina blushed and waned as she saw Lily ogle her, scrambling over to her closet to find a shirt.

"I had my tongue inside you and you're acting like I've never seen you naked before." Lily chuckled as she walked over to her, noticing the scars on her shoulder, running a smooth finger across them. She enjoyed making Nina nervous. This was how Lily… was.

Nina shook with heavy breathing at her touch. "Sorry… I just… am not used to this."

"Yeah I figured…" Lily didn't make things easier, kissing her neck, trying to ease the situation but it just made Nina's spine tingle even more. "These scars are pretty bad Nina. I noticed them last night. What's the story with these?"

_Scars…_

"… I-I am not sure." Nina quickly pulled a t-shirt over herself and some shorts soon after. She looked like a child next to Lily's sexy nightclub get up. A nice little reminder of the relationship. This… felt right. This was… real?

"Well you know, at least you're talking to me now like I'm a person now." Lily didn't let her move much, holding her chin and pushing kisses into Nina's parting lips. These kisses were like a bombardment on Nina's conscious mind. This was actually happening…

The kisses felt so good that Nina returned them by pressing those soft lips back into Lily. She was tentative but even so… she needed to express herself towards this new friend of hers.

"You know, I just got this weird vibe like you hated me or something…" Lily tilted her head. "Am I wrong?"

"No, I don't… hate you."

"Heh, well then was it fun last night for you?"

"… From what I remember. Yes."

"Then you want to do this more often then?"

Nina even surprised herself with her next words. "Y-yes…"

"Good. Glad to see… we're _finally _on the same page." Lily gave one last parting kiss before walking towards the door with the metal rod. "And by the way, invest in a lock. It's gotta be better than this… thingy." She took slow steps towards the door, sighing as she stopped.

"Uh you know I'm just delaying my departure because I think your mom is a psychotic lady right?"

Mom.

Nina just stared at her blankly, remembering her mother… almost not expecting her to be alive for some strange reason.

"No offense or anything…" Lily said to make sure she wasn't too abrasive.

_Mommy is still here… still alive._

"It's okay… I'll handle her." Nina walked out first with a calmness that made even Lily surprised. "No matter what happens, just walk out the door okay?"

"Sounds like a plan to me."

As the two opened the door to her room quietly yet with a squeak, Nina walked out first, turning to the right to see a sight she wanted and needed to see. A silent Erica Sayers at the table, sitting there well and alive. For Lily it was the creepiest thing ever, a crazed woman in the shadows looking beady eyed towards her. It was all about perspective.

"Well… I think it's time to split! I loved our sleepover Nina! We'll play more... um… Barbie dolls and stuff… doing innocent things… like that… kinda… stuff… you know… good wholesome fun!"

"J-just… see you later Lily." Nina waved her off before she could stammer more, watching the mysterious girl walk out in a furious pace. As fast as she appeared she had gone. Now it there was only two… Erica and Nina heard the door shut, both of them still not saying a word as Nina turned back to face her.

"Mommy…" Nina remembered memories of last night… where things got heated between the two Sayers women.

"You made me worry half to death last night Nina. Don't you give me that look! What were you thinking getting drunk and bringing _her _home?"

Nina didn't even say a word, for some reason needing to run over and hug her mother… like she had an appreciation from a memory… she couldn't… remember. She clutched tightly, Erica surprisingly just blinking at air a few times.

"Nina! I'm angry with you!" Erica desperately tried to keep her fury rolling.

"I know you are… but I love you and I'm happy you're here." Nina clutched her with a child's exuberance, not even thinking of the problems she's had with her at the moment. She was just happy… her mother was here for her.

"… Oh this is not fair." Erica's anger waned. "I can't… stay mad at my sweet girl. Even though I should… the things I heard last night!"

"I am sorry I had a little episode last night mommy but…" Nina pulled away for a second. "We have problems that I need to talk to you about soon."

"Yes… that's better than what happened last night where you completely ignored me." Erica reflected. "Don't do anything like that-"

"I can't live like this anymore." Nina clutched her tightly, looking serious. "I am living like a child and I know you're keeping me here because you need me."

"Nina…"

"Mommy… I am telling you right now. I see a future for you and me that can work. But if it stays like this? Something bad… will happen… I don't know how I know… but if we're not willing to change…"

"Change…" Erica mutters to herself, looking away. "Yes… that word… seems to be… haunting me."

"Look, mommy I have to go to practice now but please tonight, let's talk okay? I _need _to work this out with you. I don't want to ever hurt you again but-"

"Fair enough… you're not getting off the hook with the stunt you pulled… but… I am glad you're safe." Erica stroked her daughter's hair.

"Oh, about Lily… she isn't-"

"Stop, I had enough about that little demon seeing her today." Erica put a stop to the conversation. "Please don't remind me. I'm going to try and decontaminate my mind with painting… before we talk tonight. And we WILL talk."

"Okay… have a good day." Nina kissed her mother's cheek, stepping off and into the bathroom. She walked into the area with a sense of calm, looking around and seeing a mirror. She takes a step forward and stares. The reflection only stares back. She was moving the reflection. She was in control…

- B – B – B –

_Who is that girl I see?  
Staring straight, back at me?  
When will my reflection show  
Who I am inside? _

Control. Nina's all white outfit with the feathery top stood out against the crowd. She walked calmly, finishing her familiar metro ride all the way to Broadway. She sees the ballet studio up ahead, pushing forward. This was familiar… this was right. She stepped into the studio on time and early… watching a group of girls walk by. Her fellow swans…?

"Veronica!"

The girl turns, blinking at Nina. "What?"

"… I… I…" Nina wondered why she felt so enticed to yell out her name. It was like she was guilty about something. Like she owed this girl her own blood.

"Nina I got shit to do, will you just say what you need to say and stop staring?"

"I… I'm sorry about… giving your hopes up when I congratulated you."

"…"

"Thomas told me that he was going to pick you… honest." Nina looked meekly to the floor. "I don't know why… exactly he chose me but I didn't mean to make you feel bad."

Veronica just stared at her, really wanting to berate her. Nina was ready for it… almost wanting Veronica to let it all out in front of her face instead of behind her back. She wasn't getting it…

"Ugh, look, fair enough." Veronica sighed. "Thanks for telling me this… but don't bring this shit up anymore. Don't need to relive that crap again. Just get up and move forward."

"S-so… we're okay?"

"Well you and I have never been… okay." Veronica shrugged. "But I'll get over what happened between us. I'm a big girl." She walked off towards the dressing room, leaving Nina to herself.

"… Big girl." Nina held her bags tightly as she walked into the practice studio… the familiar practice studio. She was… a ballerina. Yes…

A dancer…

- B – B – B –

_I am now  
In a world where I have to  
Hide my heart  
And what I believe in  
But somehow  
I will show the world  
What's inside my heart  
And be loved for who I am_

Adorned in black pants and a white and gray top, Nina was dancing a part she knew meant a lot to her. The Black… Swan… this role was everything she needed and wanted in this lifetime, an obsession she couldn't truly understand at the moment. She looked in the zone regardless as she moved, for some reason any type of doubt or self-insecurity vanishing for just the split seconds she ran through choreography.

She almost expected pain as she danced the steps… but it never came. Sexuality was needed for this dance… sleeping with Lily last night… made it almost easy. This was a breeze compared to that… memory.

And when she was done?

"Finally… God damn it… finally."

Nina turned to look at her choreographer. Her teacher. Her catalyst to push herself. Thomas Leroy only glanced at her with a pleased smirk.

"W-was… that okay Thomas?"

"Finally… I see the Black Swan." Thomas clapped as if pigs had finally flown. "Nice to see you finally show up Nina."

She was being praised. It felt so good as if this was the first praise versus the countless critiques before. Nina breathed deeply as she looked around the room to mostly amused eyes, seeing Lily especially leaning against a ballet barre clapping enthusiastically. The skinny dancer let out an exhale as she turned around and walked back to her spot. This struggle to become the Black Swan was supposed to be… a horrific trip… today it felt like a breeze.

Nina froze as she stood there, closing her eyes. She was starting to feel that emotion as she peaked at Lily in the mirror.

She was starting to understand…

- B – B – B –

A reflection. That's all a dancer has. That's all a dancer can gauge her performance on. A ballerina… stares at her own reflection 90 percent of the day…

When that reflection isn't herself, what does it say about the dancer?

Nina kept staring at her reflection as she performed, pirouette after pirouette she spun and spun. Her body was so amped up and wouldn't tire even though the piano player left she knew she didn't need his help. Inside her head she could hear the piano runs and just being able to dance and move… again… was making her extremely happy.

She couldn't stop.

"Still going at it?"

Nina heard Lily's voice, the ballerina stopping herself dead on cue only for her, turning slowly like a wind up music box. That black clad woman walking towards her with a cigarette ready to go and a bag felt familiar enough. The way she had the cigarette in her mouth… lighting it…

"What are you still doing here Lily?"

"Well… I figured since you and I are kind of… like bed buddies now… if you wanted to take a break and go grab some dinner. A little break isn't a bad thing."

Nina crossed her arms, looking right into those eyes… those once scary dark eyes. She only saw care in them now. "Tell me… why you're _really _here."

"Hmm?" Lily blinked.

Awakening…

"I know how the story goes now." Nina touched the back of her shoulder blades, looking around the mirror filled practice studio. "This version of the story is nice… but it's not right." She gets into first position, expecting the mirror reflection to do something else… and then turns around expecting her reflection to slowly greet her with a sadistic smile.

"Nina… h-hey-"

"Are you here to protect me when the lights go out?" Nina looked at her in the mirror. "When the darkness is coming to get me?"

"… Are you a glutton for punishment or something?" Lily walked over to her, putting her bag down. "This is as good as it gets. This is how you want things to be right?"

"It is… but," Nina sighed, staring at Lily as she hugged herself. "You not leaving me and sleeping with you, that means the world to me." She pressed a finger into Lily's chest. "But you're not… Lily."

"…"

"You didn't stay over in my real memory." Nina said the words bitterly. "And I never feel safe in this place. Thomas doesn't praise me. The girls all hate me. Heck… I don't even know if the real Lily cares for me or not."

"Nina why can't you just be happy?" Lily had enough and pulled her close to her, their lean bodies pressing. "This is the world you want. Who gives a shit if it's real! This is better than real!"

"I'm dreaming and I can't wake up… and I don't know why. But I can't live this lie no matter how much I like it." Nina frowned. "As much as I love, having Lily care about me… I know that it wasn't this clear and easy. I know this isn't real…"

"Agh, damn you and your principles. Fuck." Lily kissed her cheek, trying to make her stop thinking. "Just let me love you here… don't go back out there."

"But I have met you before… even if you're not the real Lily haven't I?" Nina whispers, making _this _Lily freeze.

_The Taxi Ride._

_The Sex._

_The Abandonment._

"You're the _Lily _I slept with… the one that left me the next morning." Nina's mind was clearing up like a storm that was leaving. "You're my imagination… something I conjured up."

Lily didn't say a word… just like the night they had sex. Nina nodded to herself, taking the truth with a calmness she didn't know she had.

"Why did you leave?" Nina crossed her arms. "If I made you… why did you leave me?"

"I… I didn't want to leave." Lily said it truthfully. "Don't you remember?"

_A pillow to the face… stops your breathing._

"_You… _made me leave." Lily stroked her, trying to bring Nina's smile back. "So what… if I'm not real. I still don't understand why you'd want to go back to reality. That place doesn't deserve someone beautiful like you."

"Truth is all I have even if it is a horrible truth…" Nina suddenly felt Lily push her gently against the glass, staring at her like she wanted to ravage her in the most passionate way just by looking at her.

"Please… I can't stand seeing you hurt Nina. I just want you to feel good…" Lily pinned her, not wanting her to go anywhere. "You deserve rest."

"If only that was what… the real Lily… thought." Nina gasped as she felt her neck and collar bone being nibbled at. "Mmm… I don't understand… I thought Lily was my enemy… why would you even care about me? If you're nothing but a reflection of her… ungh.. t-then-"

"Just shut up… please shut up…" Lily kept begging for kisses as she held onto Nina's waist, coercing them into a heavy kissing. Nina felt herself lifted and pressed to the ground softly, Lily on top of her and their mouths locked and tongues intertwined. Real or not… the pleasure was too much to resist.

"You won't leave me this time?" Nina pulled away from Lily's succulent kisses, holding her at bay.

"If you don't want me to…" Lily looked down at her, grinding their bodies together.

"Please don't go anywhere…" Nina groaned as she tossed her head back, the reflections in the practice room mirroring the pleasure filled night these two were about to have. "If you leave me… I'll be done."

"Then I'm not going anywhere." Lily nuzzled her chin, making Nina rest her head against her. "F-fine… you want to wake up right? That's what you really want Nina?"

"I want to know… where this ends… and who I need to confront." Nina nodded reassuringly. "There's a memory… I have to deal with-"

"Just let me make love to you before you leave for good… and then I'll help you wake up…"

"T-thank… you…"

- B – B – B –

_Who is that girl I see  
Staring straight back at me?  
Why is my reflection  
Someone I don't know?  
Must I pretend that I'm  
Someone else, for all time?  
When will my reflection show  
Who I am inside? _

Heavy rain litters the entire area, waking Nina up again as she hears the quiet engine rumbling beneath her body. She was hugging around a black clad biker's waist, clinging on tightly not to fall off. The world may have changed but for the first time she felt the same. Nina was about to speak but Lily turned to her, hushing her with a finger to her lip.

Inside an alleyway they sat still like statues, on a motorcycle in the darkness of the night, Nina hearing suddenly a police car whiz by with its siren on. As it passed Lily scowled.

"Your mom probably called the cops looking for me and you." Lily calmly turned the accelerator, pulling out of the alleyway and rolling down the street as smooth as possible.

Nina hugged Lily tightly as she felt like she was inside the young body that started this mess… these visions. Both of them were the high school girls again but it was different this time. There was no mystery for Nina… she was seeing things clearly. Her youth… the last time she remembered when she was happy. Her mind was focusing on that time…

She was stuck in that youth for far too long.

"My head is splintered… and I am stuck in this nightmare because of myself." Nina held on tightly to the only warm feeling in the area… the only person that seemed to care.

Skitzo…

"I can't tell you why you can't wake up…" Lily… or what she thought was Lily said calmly. "Don't ask… it's something you have to learn for yourself."

"… I have a feeling I know why." Nina shivered at the thought as the rain soaked her clothes, the two closing in on their target. "We're heading towards…"

"The ballet performance center… yes." Lily made a sharp turn as she saw the building, not a single soul walking the streets of New York. Nina knew this was a dream like construct but took too long to realize it. Even now… even though she knew it was all fake… she didn't seem in control at all. New York City was supposed to be traffic… it looked like a ghost town.

Nina couldn't believe she couldn't even control her own dreams after realizing it.

How could she control herself when she was awake?

"This is what you wanted right?" Lily pulled up to the front entrance, Nina nodding as she leapt off and ran towards the doorway fighting through the thick rain. She was now staring at the entry, her pathway to the truth. The doors were completely chained up with heavy metal studs, no way to get in – another obstacle.

"H-how am I supposed to get inside?"

"Back up…" Lily said simply as she in turned backed up on her motorcycle in reverse. Nina blinked a few times, gasping as she knew what was coming next. In seconds Lily hit the gas full throttle as she propelled the bike forward, at the last second leaping off and rolling… the vehicle crushing the doorway and smashing a new entry through it.

Of course Lily would be some daring scarlet in a dream.

"Lily! Are you okay?" Nina ran over as Lily slowly got to all fours, coughing.

"Y-yeah…" Lily laughed to herself. "That was cool…" She was slowly helped up as Nina just rolled her eyes.

"Don't do anything like that again! You scared me!" Nina brushed her off like they were an old couple of some sort.

"… I'm not real." Lily said simply pulling herself away, walking over to the door with a cold face. "Why would you care?"

"… I…" Nina was speechless as she felt a slight bitterness in the words, only following slowly after _Lily_. They both walked into the darkness of the grand hall, the box office of the Lincoln Centre looking like a dead building.

"Fuck… my bike…" Lily frowned as she walked over to it, staring at its contorted and bent frame. She kicked it and sighed, looking over to Nina. "I'm getting you to where you need to go now. This better be worth it!"

"… Sorry." Nina said it with realness as she calmly strolled towards the theater doors.

"At least the gas tank is still intact…" Lily was poking around.

"I know what's behind here…" Nina whispers as she let out a deep breath, Lily coming to join her by her side. She looked at Lily one last time before opening the door.

"Okay… let's do this nice and smooth… whatever… _you _have in store for us… we can handle."

"Thanks for everything by the way…" Nina nodded towards the reflection, the shadow of Lily, suddenly feeling as if they were aging right in front of this door. The Lily she knew when she was awake… started to come to reality. Their clothes began to change… both of them blinking as a white ensemble began to drape over them like blankets… forming into costumes.

"What the heck…" Lily felt two feather head pieces cover the sides of her head as Nina felt the same.

"It's… opening night…" Nina opened the doors suddenly, bright lights flashing through as she saw the stage that was the bane of her existence and the source of her glory. She saw an entire crowd watching in silence as they were enticed by what they saw in this particular ballet.

"It's… me…" Nina whispered as she watched the White Swan dancing her part.

"This memory… is dark." Lily warned Nina, as she glanced around, both of them in their ballerina outfits. "Come on… we need to get backstage right now."

Nina felt Lily take her hand, running her off as they split through the crowd who made them look invisible. Suddenly she heard the crowd gasp as she felt a slight pain in her leg and thigh. "UNGH!"

"Nina!" Lily held onto her as she was about to crumple to the floor, both of them turning and staring at the stage where one of the male dancers had just dropped her.

"I… am fine… let's keep going! Before it's too late…" Nina fought to her feet, ignoring the pain, showing how much resiliency she had. This Lily was quite impressed.

"That's the Nina I know…" Lily pushed them on, the two rushing backstage, blending into the craziness that was a Leroy production. This dream was so accurate… so precise that Nina was worrying inside, knowing how this Swan Lake story ended. Regardless… she felt like she needed to face it. And this time… with help.

"Okay here's the dressing room to the Swan Queen…" Nina muttered as she held onto the doorknob.

"I'll be right behind you."

Nina didn't even hesitate smashing the door open with those supporting words… seeing that same scene that played out before. She knew this was the beginning to the end.

"Oh, I knew you'd come back. And you're too late." A Black Swan dressed Lily laughed in the mirror. "When _you _come back from your shaky start… I'll make sure that I get to dance the Black Swan for you… you confused little girl…"

"Lily…" Nina turned around as she gasped, seeing nobody there. Did Lily abandon her again?

_NO!_

"I'm dancing the Black Swan part… and you're going to die… and then I'll join you sister." _Anni _stood up from her chair, Nina now looking at the darker version of herself closing in on her.

"I won't… let you…"

"No Nina, _we_ won't let her…"

"What?" Anni suddenly felt someone pop from behind, grabbing her around the neck and pulling so tight it made her gag. Lily… hadn't gone anywhere… making the makeup clad Black Swan struggle for ever gasp of air.

"Lily!"

"Nina, go dance the part! I know you can do it without this crazy bitch!" Lily struggled to strangle the Black Swan, as she wrestled against the room, pulling her towards the doorway. "Make this memory right… for you!"

_For me…_

"LET ME GO!" The Black Swan squealed. "YOU'RE STUCK INSIDE HER HEAD LIKE ME! WHY ARE YOU HELPING HER!"

"Because it's her head… her rules… and I'm here to make sure it stays that way!" Lily, dressed like a white Swan twisted her body, crushing the Black Swan's neck to suffocation. She was losing steam quick, and Lily now controlled her. Nina couldn't believe it… someone real or not… was fighting for her.

"Y-YOU! NO! DO NOT TAKE AWAY MY TURN! THIS IS ALL I HAVE!"

"Just shut up…" Lily suddenly slammed her into the doorway repeatedly, knocking the Swan unconscious. "God damn it… Nina... you can be so annoying…" She huffed as she loosened the grip on the limp Anni.

"I can dance this…" Nina looked at herself in the mirror, feeling her costume shift to black… her make up coiling around her face like it was alive. Her eyes stayed the same though, nothing on her natural body shifting at all. She was… herself, dressed like the Black Swan.

"Go wow them out there… while I take care of this little thing…" Lily began dragging the knocked out Black Swan out of the room, Nina now alone. She hears the door open suddenly, a tearful Nina in the mirror coming in… crying from the shaky start.

"Don't cry. Pick yourself back up. You're doing great…" Nina whispers to herself, the mirror image staring at the black clad Nina like an alien. The Black Swan was supposed to trick her. She was supposed to stab herself… Nina wouldn't let it happen.

The line between their different images began to blur, both of them soon being in black and moving together as one. Nina stared at herself for one more second before she took a stand… ready to dance.

_There's a heart that must be free!  
To fly, that burns with a need  
To know the reason why  
Why? Must we all conceal  
What we think?  
How we feel?_

- B – B – B –

The dance was like a blur… like a dream… not like a nightmare. She could do it and she felt it. The passion didn't need to be connected to something so dark. She saw how everyone was staring at her like she was beautiful… like she was something more than just a dancer going through her steps. She sees a white clad Lily stage side as she danced.

"Nina keep going! Don't stop!"

Nina smiled as she kept pushing her body to the limits, not caring if this was real or not. She was going to _make _it real. She was going to force it to be real.

Just like this Lily… she didn't care if it wasn't real anymore as long as she was content. The crowd cheering was as loud as it was when she was awake… if not more so.

"Wooooo! Go Nina!" Lily whistled loudly her voice always cutting through the noise as Nina soaked in the standing ovation. She felt like her entire self… and she proved that she could do this without her darker self. This was perfect. This was perfection.

"Thank you Lily…" Nina said… only to freeze as she saw a shadow behind the one who helped her. Blood… blood… blood. "LILY! WATCHOUT!"

"Huh?" Lily suddenly vanished as the last thing Nina saw was a bloodied Anni, grabbing her support with a bladed glass against her neck, an evil grin and a wink following.

"LILY!"

_You took the only glory I had… sister._

_Now… I will take everything away from you…_

_When will my reflections show  
… Who I am inside?  
_

* * *

**A/N: **Confusing... yes. Haha... one more to go. Black Swan meets Inception... meets Sucker Punch?


End file.
